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Philip Ellwell

Text Twilight Verses

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( WARNING: This one is suggestive. You have been warned. )

 

 

In the darkness you lie, breathing easy, light on your face, your dreams overtaking you.

I watch you, watching you breath, the night alive.

Desire, old and ancient:

I crave you, all of you.

You sigh at my touch,

and moan at my clutch,

 as I drink deep of you.

You awake, my mark on your neck,

returning to your daily life,

an average boy, sweet 16,

lost in a dismal dream,

amid purgatory of school, job and home,

wishing to escape the daily groan.

Do you desire me,

my living love?

Do you know I am here,

the paler boy standing by,

watching with dark eyes,

saying nothing from the wall,

watching....

watching you.

You look at me,

and you seem to know,

I am the one who came to you.

A smile, light and sweet:

my cold heart throbs at its sight.

Do you... can you...

No, its not true:

not me and you.

Death and life,

monster, prey...

not to be together.

Night again, sweet, tender, I come to you again.

You stir: you weren't asleep, waiting for me.

" Do it... make me yours.'

A dream.. no... fantasy...

a dark one.

I drink, you sigh,

you drink of me.

Together in eternity.

We are, as one,

my love.

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Didn't I promise you I'd be here?

Don't cry...it didn't hurt.... it was fast, really....

But I know you can't hear me, even though I'm next to you, whispering in your ear...

Telling you I'm near, telling you I'm safe, born anew...

But..I barely remember you.

Did we have a past? My heart says yes, my mind doesn't know....

Hey? did you see? I made it snow!

See? Don't cry... it's a snow day!

A happy time, time to go and play.

Why are you crying? Can't you hear me? I'm whispering in your ear...

Why....

Don't you see me? Hear me?

Who are you....

Where am I....

It doesn't matter.... I'm ok...it's a snow day...

That's all that matter..snow days and fun...

I don't need anyone...i'm alone...but free...

Joy...laughter....

All from me..

A snow miser...

A spirit of winter....

That's all that matters...

The ice and snow and cold...

All that matters...

Snow miser...

....

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What are you going to do, leave?

Please: it's too late for that nonsense now: I own your life, your blood, your air...

All you know goes past me first.

Try to escape: you can't.

I have eyes to watch from every corner, every shallow.

I've got you now, there's no escape:

it's over, finished.

End game.

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I’m crazy….
Crazy for trusting you.
Crazy for falling for you.
You lied, cheated, gained my trust,
this I reflect on as I fall through the thin air,
the ending ride nothing to think of,
the ending landing…
a deadly sentence, the last of me you’ll see.
Are you proud?
You shot this bird out of the air,
with an arrow aimed to the heart.
It’s over: you won, ok?
Leave me to fall through the nightmare air,
A lost angel, fallen from grace.
Awaiting Hell…
or retribution at the end.

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Don't think I don't love you, 
but does this mean you have to fade away,
seeking shelter from the past, because of one mistake?
Simple...that's how you make this out to be,
simple and easy, but it's not, it's complicated,
but easy to forget.
you make me feel young, alive,
don't go.
Don't walk away into the rain,
you make me feel alive,
don't go,
baby...

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What are you looking for in the cold,
the icy winds that travle o'er sea and sky,
the inanimate breeze that whitewashes the land,
in poweder as fine and light as night sand.
Old friend, what are you looking for,
as you hope rises of seeing places you knew, 
long ago times coming back in a slew of almost forgotten memories, that churn in your mind like rosethorns.
Old friend....is it the cold you seek? The passionless land of ice and sleet...
or the cold icy chill of the grave you left so suddenly?

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Why the hurt, the pain, the years spent in agony...
No comfort no love, nothing...
Invisible in the proper places, social in the bad, 
rebel without a cause, being bad for the sake of being bad. 
Why? Why the Hell not: something to do in this crazy life, 
a thrill, the adrenline, the utter exctasy of it all. 
Throw the dice, take a gamble, ride the wind like a star...
Fall and see how far you land: the Earth will not welcome you. 
In the end, a downfall, disgraced, tossed out on my face.
Alone again, no one wants me. 
This wasn't the life I chose. 

Edited by Jack Frost

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Did I wait for too long?
These feelings that possess and destroy..everything I see takes me back to that time....headed no where fast. 
Keeping track of the past locked in my heart, moments wasted, looking for love that was never real to start with. 
Am I too blind to tell illusion from reality, blind to the forgotten memories that lay shattered in the mind like glass?
Give up, let it leave your mind, you really did it this time: you gave your heart away and had it shattered. 
While you're gone I just sit in my room alone and cry, lost to the web of shattered hopes and lost dreams, the pain leaving my confused and wasted, like a lost child in the darkness. 
Ask me how I feel?
I feel broken, that's how I feel .
Truth, lies, its all the same from you: enough, I know....you lie and lie..I hate to see it come from you. 
I know how dumb I really am, but so are you. 
Shattered hearts and splintered memories....
They divide and conquer the mind. 

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Did I ask for love? Yes..maybe...but I never said eternity, I never asked for forever. 

I'll just sit here in my room, people askin' me " Hey coming out soon?" 

Life passes by, now and then wasted, wrongly lent to heartbreakers and liars, 

hidden behind alibies and false fases, pictures of nothing and texts of falsififed passions. 

 

Its more than I can handle, the lies, the truth, they're both the same. 

 

It's this place, this time, this place I shouldn't be,

a call, a voice, 

reaching out to me. 

 

Am I too ruined to face it, the truth coated in lies?

Or are shattered memories all I have, decieving me with lies and  false hope?

 

I really made it bad this time, lettin' you take up root in my heart,

but when you leave, when you're gone, I feel torn, 

broken by you.

 

Lies, deciet, nothing seems to matter to you,

give up on this game, get out,

You've won the war, but not the battle.

 

Everything feels wrong, haunting me with past glimmers of nothing in particular.

Let me be, here in my room, alone with the darkness that binds us all,

heart shattered and torn assunder, 

a creature of love and loss at once.

 

Give it up: it's over, you've won, you did it this time, are you happy?

When you are gone I will cry and want to die, but those feelings won't last.

 

I'm too blind to see past your illusion, but I'll find what I lost.

 

Leave me among my shattered memories. 

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Posted ImageI don't know if you're listening
I don't know if you're there
Listen for a bit,
hear my voice 
Just for a moment
In the darkness and cold
Alone and frightened
Mercilessly tossed to the waters below
Outcast, needing help when no body else will. 
I don't know if you care,
I don't know if you're even there,
but spare me, save me,
Let me escape the night. 

Edited by Jack Frost

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If its tears, let them go, If its pain let me know, Don't hold it back, after all this time, you should know my voice, my face, If its love you want, fine, I want it too. Just promise me now and then, you'll not dream away the days, promise me you're no dreamer. It's hard to say, but I've watched you everyday day, the way you move, the words you say. I've never said a word to you, crossing by in the after school rush, never said my words, never let them be heard, a smile dropped, a passing dream. Tell me you're no dreamer.... cause that's all I am, a passing face in a dismal crowd, never heard, never hurt, never danced, never opened to romance. So I say this to you, promise me now and here... be my dreamer... - Dreamer

Edited by Jack Frost

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There you were, when I needed you, a tender shoulder to weep on. 
You listened, no matter what I said, 
Made me feel less alone. 
My dreamer, my exiled prince, 
Out of Winter's grasp you came to me, 
you fears and lies fast losing their grip, 
your struggle with the dark a void in your soul.
I kinda liekd it your way, 
how we stole away into the dark, 
flying high o'er darkened homes,
flying free on Winter winds, 
Like ravens in the night. 
Don't pretend you don't hurt, have pain, 
let me know, tell me...
Trust...
My Winter dreamer. 

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Love, curses all
You will never know, 
A dreamer in a deadly sleep.
You see my face, and hear my voice, 
and fall into my deadly spell. 
Nothing really matters,
except happily ever after, 
Which you will not get as you sleep the years away. 

Love curses all, 
you will never know, 
trapped in a restless dream. 
A rose thorn, easy and swift, 
old sins come back, 
a debt to be paid. 

Love curses all, 
as you well know, 
love is a curse, 
and now you will now, 
as broken hearts wreak unholy revenge. 

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Wishing on a star, only gets you so far.
wishing on dreams, following what the mean. 
My life is free, as good as it seems, 
the past gone like a hazy dream, 
lost forever in the future's gleam. 
I'm never going back, never passing the beaten track.
I will find my way, go off on my quest. 
Past trials and dangers, the road ahead winds,
I don't know what lies at the end, but I know it's my happy ending. 
Past the road unwinding, through snow that glistens and gleams, past figures waltzing in hazy dreams, nothing really as it seems, the past a mass of silvery gleams. 
At last, i'm set free. 

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My memories struggle to form..
What comes is just a darkened haze. 
Figures walk in the backlands of my mind, hoping to come to the light, but tremors of the mind banish them to oblivion once more. 
All of my memories scream in silent fears, broken like a rotted glass, the past a distant starry haze, all gone and lost.
The road ahead goes where I know not, virgin territory my mind can not claim: a darkened wood, a road bend..
Silent tears will keep back fears, but only moving on will save my sanity, as the moon watches with a cold blind eye upon this child of innocence reborn again. 

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Toying with emotions, its what you do. 
Somehow our love became undone before it had begun. 
All I asked for was affection, not the world or stars as my own.
All I wanted was returned love from you, but you left instead, abandoning all that we knew. 
It's been two days, I think ,you know, not sure: time passes slow and fast when your love has crashed to your feet. 
Love is a dance, a deadly game, beautiful and strange, a masquerade of emotion and words, meaningless and true as we waltz through. 
But you never stop to think of what you leave behind, the shattered remnants of your waltz partner when the music dies, and the candles go out. 
-Deadly waltz 

Edited by Jack Frost

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Posted ImagePosted ImagePosted Image

 

I'm not saying don't be fiction,
I'm not saying please be real. 
I'm not saying break fantasy's borders, 
making visions come alive,
in a world you can not survive.
I'm not saying let it pass, 
I'm not asking for this to end,
I'm not saying let me have you,
as a lover, confidant, friend.
I'm not saying let my fantasy, make you a reality,
I'm not saying join me, in the humdrum world alone.
All I'm saying is let me, just for awhile, that's all I ask,
escape myself, see the light, and explore a new reality, 
a far off landscape of hopes and dreams, 
that flicker and wave on the screen. 
Through book, film, video game,
let me escape the daily pain,
just for awhile, let me be with you,
in the glittering void of fantasy.
-Fantasy

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