Col.Random

On 5/17/2020 at 5:07 PM, WakelessDream said:

I'm glad you made the decision to move on, it's easier said than done. It's one thing to be told by others (who of course mean well for you) or acknowledge that you need to do that yourself, but actually coming to terms with that decision yourself is so so liberating , and often times you find yourself in a better place. 

I was faced with a similar decision not too long ago. No romantic feelings involved though, just a friendship, and I did try persistently to maintain it after things got rough, but in the end to no avail. It weighed down on me for a long while, and after a long time I realized how unhealthy it was for me, and just made the decision to let go. 

I think it's natural to have doubts about it, or be afraid to let go of what you had, but if it's taking a negative toll on you I do believe it's for the best to move on. And I absolutely agree with you that it's a two way street, and if it's meant to be another way they'll reach out from their end as well. 

One thing I always try to remind myself of is to be grateful for all the loved ones, friends, and family that I do have in the here and now. It's something that helps me to keep moving forward, and makes me feel better about my decision.

I do hope that you're able to heal if it's something that's bogging you down, and I wish you luck and hope you do find what you're looking for eventually!

thanks Wakeless! Yeah it feels a bi weird to let go of something you feel you need to hold on to, but there's no point when it's only one person holding on to it

This was originally going to start as a post asking for advice so feel free to throw in your opinion, but lately I've been learning to be more confident and firm so I figured it was better to make this decision and just announce it here just because it kinda feels good to get it off my chest.
Also this post is gonna be kinda long and doesn't have all the details cause ugh i'm so tired of putting more energy into this thing.
(Also I apologize to the mods in advance cause I wasn't sure which forum this should go into >_<)

I've been in love with this girl I met during my first year in college. I was hella nervous and awkward around her  in the first few months so I can definitely understand how that must have turned her off. Anyway, I asked her out a bit too soon and naturally got a "do you mind being just friends?" reply. Obviously I said I was fine with it but I still liked her so I would still try texting her and talking to her when I could. She seemed to try avoiding me a lot, but was really nice and wouldn't ignore me. I would also try not being to pushy or text her regularly at first because well if someone's avoiding you, it's better not to keep bothering them. Of course I was a bit selfish I guess so every now and then I couldn't help but want to get to know her better so I would still approach and talk to her from time to time.
(Note: I had been told at one point that a few of her friends actually recommended her to go out with me, so like you know I guess I wasn't as bad as I thought i was)

This is where a friend usually told me I needed to be more persistent rather than giving up on her.

That advice, is the advice that has bothered me for a long time, partially because in a lot of people's lovelife persistence does work. Because you see a lot of time has gone by since then and I did become more persistent in talking to her and we grew a bit closer. Some of my friends even felt we had good chemistry and that she did sort of like me. Eventually, before I transferred to America, I did confess my feelings and asked her if she sees us being a thing. She kind of gave me a personal reason for why she doesn't think it would work out and I understood and respected that. It kind of explained why she kept me at a distance and why it often felt like I was the only one ever starting our conversations, never the other way around
I still kept talking to her every now and then, because I couldn't stop being in love with her and wanting to spend time with her or doing nice things for her where I could. Don't get me wrong, I definitely think I was being selfish. Eventually I transferred to the U.S and well, I decided it was time for me to stop being the person that always texts first and starts the conversation. We barely spoke since then and it became more and more clear that I was the only one ever trying to talk.
I'm not sure why I'm like this, I've never felt so strongly about another woman ever before, so even after being really far away I couldn't stop thinking about her and on some level comparing other girls I met to her. I felt it was holding me back so i deleted her from my instagram and well she found out. She asked me about it and after a small argument I confessed that I still had feelings for her and needed space to move on.(PEOPLE TAKE NOTE: If you want to distance yourself from someone you've made your feelings clear to, please for the love of god talk to them BEFORE you do it)
(Additonal note: during that conversation she said she didn't keep in touch because she felt I wanted to start a new. I get that, but it kind of doesn't change the fact that someone is willing to spend no time to even check up on how you're doing)

Here's where a big part of my dilemma is. I have tried meeting other girls in my new university, but so far it feels like I still haven't met anyone I feel even half as strongly about. It's like what I felt for her was something special and even now I can't shake off the feeling that I'm making a mistake completely giving up on her and moving on.
To make it more complicated, a close of friend of mine fell really deeply for a woman he met around the same time. He's the friend that advised me to be more persistent in the first place, because he was like that himself. In fact he was a bit too much, as everyone else around him usually says. He absolutely refuses to give up on her even after 3 years and has constantly kept texting and reaching out to the girl he likes first, only holding on to the really small chance that it can work out someday. Like me, he also transferred to the U.S so is far away from the woman he's been in love with, but he has constantly planned and focused on the idea that he can make it work out in the future, despite the fact that she now had two boyfriends since meeting him.
But the thing is, she actually reaches out to him to keep in touch and they talk a lot about things, sometimes pretty deep conversations. It's even starting to sound like it might work out for him someday and I'd be happy for him, but it would sure as hell leave me with the feeling that I made the wrong choice.

This is where I'm left questioning if my choices were wrong. Was constant, undying persistence in showing the woman you like you refuse to give up on her the right choice? Maybe I found someone really special and screwed everything up. I've been feeling like that alot, what if I had one chance at finding love and I was too shy to go for it and eventually gave up on her? What if I've screwed up by giving up on a woman who is sweet, honest, intelligent and open-minded. A woman who's values are similar to mine and feels like someone who would honestly make a great partner if we ever managed to give things a go.
That's been eating at me a lot lately. What if I ruined my chance at love by giving up when I should have simply refused to give up and persuaded her to give things a chance? I think it scares me because I've grown up seeing a lot of bad marriages and relationships and I can't shake the idea that the chances of me having a happy one are little to none and I've sometimes heard people give this advice where when you find someone really special who makes amazes you and makes your heart skip a beat you hold on and never let go.

But here I am, making the final decision to let go of her for good. I still have doubts about it and I'm a little scared I really am completely ending the chances of making things work out with a pretty amazing person, in a lot of ways that I'd rather not detail in a post on the internet. So what governed my decision to push forward and move on anyway? Because despite how naiive I am, I believe love, the love that's healthy and worth holding on to, is a two-way effort. She is a phenomenal woman and I may have been an idiot a couple of times, but the one thing I always felt was myself trying to give things a chance and her hardly trying. She had her reasons, I'm not silly enough to be mad at her for them, but I'm still going to move forward, because no matter how amazing she is, I don't feel happy. I don't feel happy about the idea of chasing someone who clearly doesn't want to be chased and I sure as hell don't wanna be a selfish jerk who expects her to put up with my feelings.

I don't think being persistent is bad and I plan to be more confident and persistent the next time I really like someone, but whatever chance I had with this woman is in the past and at this point I think my feelings have just dragged on pointlessly. Another thing is my current belief that when it's meant to be and you walk away, that person is going to actually try and stop you. I don't see her even reaching out to me so I think I'm just going to keep moving on.

I'll keep moving on till I find someone I like that makes me feel like I'm not the only one trying.

It's a tough choice for me between Riku and Goofy

9 hours ago, Inçendyne said:

People were probably starting to think you both were the same person.

nani

damn this chat is moving faster than i can keep up

my girlfriend

Dragons all the way

For me one of my favorite things was the Donald and Goofy are the ones to join Sora for the final fight because KH1 started with these three teaming up and it felt amazing to see them team up for the last battle

I did kinda hate that Xehanort got off easy though

well speaking of anniversaries i'm around 8 years.

GOD THIS WEBSITE LOOKS SO DIFFERENT NOW

18 minutes ago, Le Weed said:

I know, I still have memories of my first year in the forum

Damn, I was cringy af

SLH IS THAT YOU?

Currently it's to look back at the older days like some weird old man

Hey everyone, so i've been trying to teach myself Japanese for the past few months and I'm kinda stuck at one point. I was hoping someone who understands Japanese could help explain to me what's going on in these conversations.

Along side the actual conversations I've put my own translations of what I think is happening in the conversation so please correct me where I'm wrong ^^

Okay so this second one is where I'm getting a bit confused

And for this one I have absolutely no idea wtf is going on

Okay guys, i hope you've enjoyed watching me butcher the japanese language. Now I would really love you guys if you helped me figure some of this out.
Along with that can someone elaborate on the meanings of:
sono koto de
mittsu-kita

donna koto

Thanks a bunch

He's the worst. He does it on purpose; i wouldn't put it past him to try and beat Sora to death with his staff in KH3.

I think sometimes he doesn't and sometimes he does so i guess it works for people every now and then, but there's moments where he fails you at the worst possible time. People tend to exaggerate in humour so that might be why you think people genuinely believe he sucks

This picture is the most amazing thing I've ever seen

Surfing the web for cats because I won't die completely alone if I'm a crazy cat man

So I have a huge problem @_@
I'm probably being completely crazy, but hey love is the kind of bullshit that drives everyone crazy.

So recently I started to really like this girl....well i actually started liking her two months ago but now i've actually had more chances to talk to her and I'm closer to her friends than I was back then and to be honest I'm starting to really like this girl and I had this whole plan laid out where I would get to know her better and ask her out some time this week on my very first date.

Now here's where things get shitty...a few days ago I started to suspect one of my best friends might be starting to get attracted to me, but my sister told me I was probably just misinterpreting things cause I really haven't been very good at reading women in the past.
But of course I know that I'm actually quite better and reading people's emotions now so let's assume my suspicions are true.

Now lately a friend of mine had gone and squealed to the friends of the girl i like and they all basically know I like and plan to ask her out now so for the past few days I have been trying to talk more to that girl and it's become quite obvious to all my friends that I really like her.

Last night some friends and I went out for dinner and this best friend who likes me seemed really depressed and at one point mentioned that no guy would date her because of her looks and she went home after a while, depressed and boy did i feel like a complete moron for not being more careful about her feelings before. I was a dumbass, so openly talking about this beautiful and kind girl that I was starting to really like. Take note folks, learning to keep one's mouth shut is a valuable ability.

So now we get to the complicated part.
On one hand there is this beautiful girl I like who literally everyone describes as one of the genuinely kindest and most caring people you could know and well I'm a sucker for good people so naturally I'd end up being really attracted to her and I've also gotten the feeling that she might be attracted to me. If things work out my first girlfriend could be this amazing person and we might even be really happy together.

On the other hand, my best friend has survived cancer twice and she still has to regularly go and get chemo and meds. In addition to that she has self-esteem issues when it comes to her looks and now the guy she may have wanted to be with is attracted to someone else. That's just way to much bullshit happening to a person at one time and now i'm trying to figure out what to do.

I've arrived at three possible ways and note that they all HAVE to involve attempting to ask out the girl I like in some way because at this point too many people know I like her and are expecting me to so it would look really odd if I abruptly chickened out and be like "whoops changed my mind! Them hormones am i right?"

Possibility 1: I proceed with trying to find love at the risk of breaking my best friend's heart and I really do not want to make her feel that way

Possibility 2: I attempt to sabotage my first date: This has two ways:
1) I find out if there's a guy who likes the same girl as me and figure out a way to talk him into asking her out then if he does I can just be like "oh well I wasn't fast enough"
2) I go on this date and I deliberately become a really boring and awkward date and then she won't be interested in a relationship.

Possibility 3: I go on my first date and I try my best to make it a good one, but at the end of it, regardless of whether she's interested in a relationship I just come clean about everything and tell her I can't be with her even if i wanted to. She's a kind person, I'm sure she'd understand.

If I go with 2 and 3, then I can wait a few weeks and ask my best friend out. To be honest I don't have romantic feelings for her, but we have a ton of things in common and well attraction is something I've heard can grow.

But then that also seems like a terrible idea cause women are smart and they can tell if you're not really into them.

It just seems like my friend's getting hurt somehow in every scenario I've thought of

So I've been thinking this over and over and I keep struggling to figure out the right solution so I decided the only thing I can do is ask people for their opinion on this. How do you guys think I should go about this

this one's kinda mushy and gross and super personal

It's a really tough one but if i had to pick it would be the depths of darkness especially because of the part where you finally begin to see the light at the end. It's such a beautiful moment and it's so amazing to watch that gentle light touch down on the rocks around you while contrasting the really dark areas behind you

i'm expecting one of those fancy armours from BBS

2 seems appropriate. People often forget that there's plenty of people out there who struggle to make the money and the time needed to play something they really wanted to play and it must really suck to have it all spoiled for them

You can read a bit about and donate here. I wanted to send some cash myself, but i neither have a credit card nor a paypal.

But you guys can, even if it's just 5 dollars.
https://herofund.whitehelmets.org/donate/crowdfund?source=fbwbty#

I expected this
https://www.facebook.com/SteveKardynalFans/videos/1292841947428290/?pnref=story

*facepalms* I can't believe i'm only now finding this oh my god T_T
Thank you so much guys 

My favourite would have to be my very first souls game, the first Dark Souls. It was an experience unlike any other game i had played- the characters, the lore, the beauty of the environment-especially the contrast between places like New Londo and Anor Londo- and finally the gameplay and music. I genuinely took several months to beat this game but i fell in love with the series.
Most people complain about DS2 but i personally enjoyed it. I still feel like Vendrick deserves more love from the fans, since his story is pretty sad and he clearly made some huge, important discoveries. Just a shame Dark Souls 3 practically pretends the events of DS2 never happened.

The BBS trio holding hands. They look so happy in that scene and it's just so heartwarming seeing them together again. Plus it's in stark contrast to a scene a little before that where they were still together, but Ven and Terra were still possessed so this switch from a darker moment to a happier one is beautiful

To some extent i can definitely fight. I've been taking muay thai and silat lately to improve my ability and i managed to get upto a yellow belt in MMA, but kinda disappointed i didn't go further ^^

with the amount of time it took for us to get to kh3, i don't think we have to worry about kh13 in our lifetime. Maybe our grandkids' time, but not our's

Happy Birthday Neptune ^^