Posted September 29, 201015 yr Darkness. Pure black darkness. Outside the sirens were still ringing. Tiny bodies huddled together in the cramped unseeable place. The sirens stop. Utter silence. Boom! The first one drops and they can feel it, feel its power. A little one starts to cry, and an invisible figure holds him tight. They can hear them dropping. Sometimes in the distance. Sometimes unbearably close. Time passes slowly, feeling like days. All noises stop. Utter silence. The sirens go off again. The clear. They open the cellar door as light comes back to London.
September 29, 201015 yr Very nice! I really like it. ^^ I see no mistakes, and your vocab is awesome. :]
September 29, 201015 yr Author thank you very much (: lol, if it was longer there'd prolly be things for grammar ( iabusecommasD8 ) but there was a project at school to write a flash fiction of 50-100 words soyeah. owo
September 29, 201015 yr thank you very much (: lol, if it was longer there'd prolly be things for grammar ( iabusecommasD8 ) but there was a project at school to write a flash fiction of 50-100 words soyeah. owo Haha no problem. I tend to abuse commas as well.
Darkness. Pure black darkness.
Outside the sirens were still ringing.
Tiny bodies huddled together in the cramped unseeable place.
The sirens stop.
Utter silence.
Boom!
The first one drops and they can feel it, feel its power.
A little one starts to cry, and an invisible figure holds him tight.
They can hear them dropping.
Sometimes in the distance.
Sometimes unbearably close.
Time passes slowly, feeling like days.
All noises stop.
Utter silence.
The sirens go off again.
The clear.
They open the cellar door as light comes back to London.