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me + (very) short story = this thread

Posted

I had to write a short story to an english text in 150-180 words.So, I just wrote anything that appeared in my mind and the text below was the result. My first short story ever. Tell m what you think

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

 

T.H.E.M.

 

When I started on the journey I had no Idea about what was going to happen. Instead, I just felt my heart beating faster telling me: "just go!"

"Are you sure about this, young lady?"

The loud voice of the man sitting beside me echoed in my ears making me more excited. I knew I had to go, although it was too dangerous. "But that's my only chance, it's now or never" I thought. Finally, I took a deep breath, lifted my head answering: "Yes"

"Very well" he said, coldly, in reply "But remember: we are out laws and you are just a little non-skilled girl, if you ever got caught we wouldn't mind leaving you behind"

"I'll take the risk" My blood became cold like ice and my face turned white like snow. Breaking into scientific facility looked suicide, but I had to try. That was the only way to save THEM. I had to save THEM

THEM was my life and since my birth I knew THEM meant more than the world not only to me but to all mankind.

A noise was heard. Our plane was taking off. Heading straight to my doom, where my hope lied faithful.

 

-------------------

-Don't ask me about the meaning of the last sentece in the last paragraph. -Don't ask what the hell is a THEM.

-I just wrote whatever I had in mind, don't ask me why, not even I know. :D:P

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I like the story, but if you're turning this in for a grade, I see some places that could use some editing. After someone speaks, you can't just put the quotation marks--you have to put a comma, period, question mark, or something. Use spell checker before you hand this in, and you'll do good. C:

I liked it.

  • Author

Thanks lexi, I'll follow your tips next time my teacher ask me for an essay, I've already given it to her, and now i'm waiting to see wich grade I got... I wish it was agood one beacause my others grades weren't very good (actually, they were very bad x.x) And thanks, Eterna, it seems I'm not as bad as I tought at writing...

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

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