This is how the Bully Project has affected me. I would like to hear your story too! I know Bullying is an important topic, don't be afraid to report it. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wM1yz17lwZ8

Edited November 5, 201410 yr by kingdomlanelover

Awesome video Bullying is a very important subject

 

 

As for my story.....well, my story is a very ....sad and long one, but if you really want to hear it, then I will tell it.

 

My memories of it are both vivid and locked away, and there are a lot of pieces to it, but I will try to summarise it to the best of my memory. 

 

It happened over years, so I will have to just write what I remember

 

 

 

 

I live in Australia. (For context)

 

It started when I was very young. About five/six. I was smart for my age, which is probably why I can remember it well.

 

What I believed, was that I was loved, I had a group of friends, everyone at school was nice to me. 

 

But...I caused mischief, and was bullied in return. At that age, though, I was so optimistic about everything I didn't let it get to me. There were times when I wouldn't go to school for some reason, but the worst was yet to come.

 

My family had an abusive relationship. My biological father was a total jerk, he called me a bitch and beat my mother. 

 

The real suffering began when I had to move away, to a new suburb, and a new school. The brothers bullied me and teased me nearly everyday at home, and my mother, stressed, would yell at me, and she fought with her boyfriend constantly, and my biological father came for visits, which usually ended up in fighting between my mother and him at the door before we went to a movie or something. The police came often and I was no longer optimistic. I became a pessimist. 

 

He only acted as if he cared though. He didm't do anything to me, but he ignored me, smoked, took drugs, as was a total douche. But being as young as I was I just wanted my daddy. I now hate him and he hasn't spoken to me since I was 10.

 

When I moved to the new school, My brother, Dylan, picked me up from school, but when we got home he would bash me and bully me, we treated each other as brothers instead of brother and sister, which was fine, but he didn't seem to care about my feelings, and often friendly teasing would lead to me crying and him throwing even more insults at me for crying. He's much nicer now, though, and we get along, but it didn't help at the time, because I was bullied at school as well. 

 

As for my other brother, Josh, he is still a jerk to me. And always has. But I love him anyway, because he has many problems of his own, including aspergers.

 

A lot like you in that way, I would to school, get bullied, then come home and be bullied by both of my brothers, and have to deal with fighting adults. The real icing on the cake was at that time, with all that hurt, I then lost my grandmother. I cried for hours, but my mum, upset herself, just told me to shut up. She is loving, and we a BBF's now, but back then she often forgot about my needs and unintentionally hurt me.

 

At primary school, my entire year hurt me physically and emotionally. I acted out in an effort to cope, but this usually led to even more bullying.

I learnt that by making people laugh, I could get a better response, I knew they were laughing at me and I paid for it later in the classroom, and I cried about it later, but as long as I acted like a fool, I felt happy. Like I was having fun. 

 

I later realised that this was a poison of a mindset

 

My ''friends'', utterly broke me over the years, to the point where true friendship and love only exists in fantasy to me now.

 

My now ex-childhood friends, that had made at the new school, gold creek, were two girls called Melanie and Azure. 

 

Because of the bullying, them and grace were the only people who talked to me, other only talked to me because they wanted marbles or to insult me, and when I wasn't getting shoved into brick walls, I sat alone each lunch, except for the times when they decided to give me company. They made kids who didn't wear a hat sit in the ''No-hat zone'' and that is were I often was, because I lost my hat and couldn't get a new one. I had to watch all the other kids play. If I ever asked to play with them, I was denied and laughed at. My childhood was not a happy one at all. 

 

I remember, that Azure was year above me, so as I was nearing high school, azure had already gotten to the high school, and walked to the high each morning, so my only chance to talk to her was then. (The high school and primary were only two ovals from each other, and you could see one from the other)

 

I would wait each day for Azure, but many times she didn't come, or was talking to someone else and ignored me, only saying hi, despite the fact that I had waited for her since early morning. It hurt

 

Once I had gotten into the high school, at 12, the bullying only continued further and got worse. I had long stopped the acting out. But in return I had become very unstable. I was violent and cried often.

 

In 2011, I got acne and such, and I became extremely insecure, partly because people bullied me due to it. I was bullied for being ''flat-chested'',, ''Psycho'', ''werid'' and ''ugly''.

 

The friends I sat with eventually betrayed me, save for three that I am still friends with today, since they were there for me, But the others stabbed me in the back many times. My first boyfriend left me because I accused him of flirting with my friend, then said friend hated me, he dumped me, and then said friend and my ex got together the day after he dumped me. Essentially , that proved that I was right all along. I got bullied everytime I went into the classroom, and ugh, man, there is far, far more, than this, and I'm not going into every detail, but you probably get the idea. Also I still sat alone at lunch alot of the time.

 

I started attempting suicide, but I never had the courage to go through with it.

 

The worst treatment, however, was from Azure. At this point, she was my best friend, and had been a friend for years now, so naturally I had a strong bond with her.

 

There were some fights and harsh words, some back-stabbing, but we always came back together, we were like sisters and she treated me nice alot as well.

 

Until we had an....odd relationship. That was when I began to lose her. The last three years were the last we talked to each other.

 

Azure is the one who .....took my innocence away.....and I fell for her, but a year after we began having a sexual relationship, and we had both moved into a private school, she started to talk to me less and less, and azure had always been pre-occupied with being popular, so she often ditched me for others at lunch. She felt  that I embarrassed her, so we had to talk after school. 

 

Sometimes she acted as though she loved me. It was a poisonous relationship. She even said she never loved me, she just wanted to use my body to feel nice.

 

The final straw, which led to me being at home with distance education right now instead of going to school normally like other teenagers, was two things

 

1. I was bullied at the private school. And often had psychological episodes and sat alone. This happened last year.

2. Azure became massively bitchy, and even tried to make me do bad things like drugs, being someone who never gives in to peer pressure, I didn't and we fought over this, and she never talked to me again.

 

Years of abuse, not all of which is said here, led to me having a very unstable personality. To the point were people accuse me of having multiple personality disorder, which counsellors say I do not have.

 

That's what I can manage to write, but needless to say my childhood is dramatic. On good thing, though, Is that I don't care about fitting in, or what people say anymore, I don't care what people think of me, I just be myself and have fun. I noticed some bullies stopped trying when I didn't respond, but....that lead to me ignoring my classmates out of fear. I was actually afraid of my classmates when I went to a physical school everyday. 

 

 

 

Every since I was little I played games and read books to escape

Edited November 5, 201410 yr by KittensOnFire

Awesome video Bullying is a very important subject

 

 

As for my story.....well, my story is a very ....sad and long one, but if you really want to hear it, then I will tell it.

 

My memories of it are both vivid and locked away, and there are a lot of pieces to it, but I will try to summarise it to the best of my memory. 

 

It happened over years, so I will have to just write what I remember

 

 

 

 

I live in Australia. (For context)

 

It started when I was very young. About five/six. I was smart for my age, which is probably why I can remember it well.

 

What I believed, was that I was loved, I had a group of friends, everyone at school was nice to me. 

 

But...I caused mischief, and was bullied in return. At that age, though, I was so optimistic about everything I didn't let it get to me. There were times when I wouldn't go to school for some reason, but the worst was yet to come.

 

My family had an abusive relationship. My biological father was a total jerk, he called me a bitch and beat my mother. 

 

The real suffering began when I had to move away, to a new suburb, and a new school. The brothers bullied me and teased me nearly everyday at home, and my mother, stressed, would yell at me, and she fought with her boyfriend constantly, and my biological father came for visits, which usually ended up in fighting between my mother and him at the door before we went to a movie or something. The police came often and I was no longer optimistic. I became a pessimist. 

 

He only acted as if he cared though. He didm't do anything to me, but he ignored me, smoked, took drugs, as was a total douche. But being as young as I was I just wanted my daddy. I now hate him and he hasn't spoken to me since I was 10.

 

When I moved to the new school, My brother, Dylan, picked me up from school, but when we got home he would bash me and bully me, we treated each other as brothers instead of brother and sister, which was fine, but he didn't seem to care about my feelings, and often friendly teasing would lead to me crying and him throwing even more insults at me for crying. He's much nicer now, though, and we get along, but it didn't help at the time, because I was bullied at school as well. 

 

As for my other brother, Josh, he is still a jerk to me. And always has. But I love him anyway, because he has many problems of his own, including aspergers.

 

A lot like you in that way, I would to school, get bullied, then come home and be bullied by both of my brothers, and have to deal with fighting adults. The real icing on the cake was at that time, with all that hurt, I then lost my grandmother. I cried for hours, but my mum, upset herself, just told me to shut up. She is loving, and we a BBF's now, but back then she often forgot about my needs and unintentionally hurt me.

 

At primary school, my entire year hurt me physically and emotionally. I acted out in an effort to cope, but this usually led to even more bullying.

I learnt that by making people laugh, I could get a better response, I knew they were laughing at me and I paid for it later in the classroom, and I cried about it later, but as long as I acted like a fool, I felt happy. Like I was having fun. 

 

I later realised that this was a poison of a mindset

 

My ''friends'', utterly broke me over the years, to the point where true friendship and love only exists in fantasy to me now.

 

My now ex-childhood friends, that had made at the new school, gold creek, were two girls called Melanie and Azure. 

 

Because of the bullying, them and grace were the only people who talked to me, other only talked to me because they wanted marbles or to insult me, and when I wasn't getting shoved into brick walls, I sat alone each lunch, except for the times when they decided to give me company. They made kids who didn't wear a hat sit in the ''No-hat zone'' and that is were I often was, because I lost my hat and couldn't get a new one. I had to watch all the other kids play. If I ever asked to play with them, I was denied and laughed at. My childhood was not a happy one at all. 

 

I remember, that Azure was year above me, so as I was nearing high school, azure had already gotten to the high school, and walked to the high each morning, so my only chance to talk to her was then. (The high school and primary were only two ovals from each other, and you could see one from the other)

 

I would wait each day for Azure, but many times she didn't come, or was talking to someone else and ignored me, only saying hi, despite the fact that I had waited for her since early morning. It hurt

 

Once I had gotten into the high school, at 12, the bullying only continued further and got worse. I had long stopped the acting out. But in return I had become very unstable. I was violent and cried often.

 

In 2011, I got acne and such, and I became extremely insecure, partly because people bullied me due to it. I was bullied for being ''flat-chested'',, ''Psycho'', ''werid'' and ''ugly''.

 

The friends I sat with eventually betrayed me, save for three that I am still friends with today, since they were there for me, But the others stabbed me in the back many times. My first boyfriend left me because I accused him of flirting with my friend, then said friend hated me, he dumped me, and then said friend and my ex got together the day after he dumped me. Essentially , that proved that I was right all along. I got bullied everytime I went into the classroom, and ugh, man, there is far, far more, than this, and I'm not going into every detail, but you probably get the idea. Also I still sat alone at lunch alot of the time.

 

I started attempting suicide, but I never had the courage to go through with it.

 

The worst treatment, however, was from Azure. At this point, she was my best friend, and had been a friend for years now, so naturally I had a strong bond with her.

 

There were some fights and harsh words, some back-stabbing, but we always came back together, we were like sisters and she treated me nice alot as well.

 

Until we had an....odd relationship. That was when I began to lose her. The last three years were the last we talked to each other.

 

Azure is the one who .....took my innocence away.....and I fell for her, but a year after we began having a sexual relationship, and we had both moved into a private school, she started to talk to me less and less, and azure had always been pre-occupied with being popular, so she often ditched me for others at lunch. She felt  that I embarrassed her, so we had to talk after school. 

 

Sometimes she acted as though she loved me. It was a poisonous relationship. She even said she never loved me, she just wanted to use my body to feel nice.

 

The final straw, which led to me being at home with distance education right now instead of going to school normally like other teenagers, was two things

 

1. I was bullied at the private school. And often had psychological episodes and sat alone. This happened last year.

2. Azure became massively bitchy, and even tried to make me do bad things like drugs, being someone who never gives in to peer pressure, I didn't and we fought over this, and she never talked to me again.

 

Years of abuse, not all of which is said here, led to me having a very unstable personality. To the point were people accuse me of having multiple personality disorder, which counsellors say I do not have.

 

That's what I can manage to write, but needless to say my childhood is dramatic. On good thing, though, Is that I don't care about fitting in, or what people say anymore, I don't care what people think of me, I just be myself and have fun. I noticed some bullies stopped trying when I didn't respond, but....that lead to me ignoring my classmates out of fear. I was actually afraid of my classmates when I went to a physical school everyday. 

 

 

 

Every since I was little I played games and read books to escape

Thank you so much for sharing. Your story gives me hope, the fact that all of that happened to you and you still can look for the bright side! Video games helped me as well. Kingdom Hearts always taught me that there's always light in the darkness.  

Thank you so much for sharing. Your story gives me hope, the fact that all of that happened to you and you still can look for the bright side! Video games helped me as well. Kingdom Hearts always taught me that there's always light in the darkness.

Thank you

 

Yeah, there's always a light, somewhere, even if it seems hard to find