Intro:

Sora, Riku, And Kairi sit at the island until a letter came telling Sora he needs to connect people's hearts to his. Now Sora and Riku start to get ready for the quest they'll never forget. One day, When they were ready to set out. Mickey. Donald, And Goofy came asking for Sora and Riku to come with them. They all then went to Yen Sid's tower. There Riku and Sora were told they had to take a mark of mastey test.

 

Chapter I

Sora

'' A mark of mastey test?'' Asked Sora as he nevered heard of it before.

' The mark of mastey test is what young keybladers like youshelfs take to see if they are worthy of being keyblade masters.''said Mickey as he was telling them.

'' Master Yen Sid. Why do me and Sora have to tak this test.''asked Riku.

'' We need to see who's a real master. You see as Mickey told you. Their were three keybladers 11 years ago. Ventus, Terra, And Aqua. Among those three. Aqua was the only one who became one. Now I need you two to take it. My is different.''said Yen Sid.

'' What do you mean ' Yours' ''questioned Sora.

'' My will have you fight a Twilight Thron.''

'' Wait. Is that like a nobody.'' asked Sora. Sora then put his hands on his head. Roxas's memory in the fake Twilight Town showed him what it was.

'' Now go. Sora, Riku. I'll see you two when you come back.''said Yen Sid as he sented Riku and Sora to a different world.

 

Sora landed in Travese Town.'' Hey I rememeber this world. It was my first world I came to.''said Sora as he started walking around. Sora walked around the town until he saw the Twilight Thron.'' I guess that's the thing Yen Sid was talking about.'' said Sora as he got out his kingdom key. The Twilight Thron attacked Sora. Sora dodged most of the attacks.'' Man. This thing is tough.''said Sora. Then it lanch another attack. Sora then put away his kingdom key and bought oathkeeper and oblivion. Sora then saw that he was holding two. He hasn't held two keyblades since he used Riku's to defeat Xemnas. He dodged another attack and then slashed a X on the nobody. The thron was then defeated. Sora then disappeared and went back to Yen Sid's tower.

 

Sora appeared back in the tower. He saw Riku by him.

'' Sora. Riku defeated his like it was nothing.''said Mickey.

'' Now. Its time for the final part of the test. You two must fight each other.''said Yen Sid as Riku and Sora were then shock.

This is very very good.Please write more.

Chapter XII

Riku

Terra looked at Xehanort.'' I don't have time for this.''said Xehanort as he opened a portal of darkness and left. The portal was still opened. It look different then before.'' Riku. I know what your thinking. You can't go follow him. I sense something bad in that portal. It a stronger darkness.''said Terra as he put his hand on Riku's soldier.'' You have a choice. The good one is stay here and help me find my friends or go into that portal and be sallowed by the darkness.''said Terra.

 

Riku was thinking. If he went into that portal then he won't see Mickey or Sora ever again. He then made up his mind. He was about to start walking to the portal till the gummi ship landed on the mountain. Sora and Aqua came out.

'' Aqua?''asked Terra.

Chapter XIII

Sora

Sora looked at Aqua.'' So, All we need is to go to the castle where I met Namine at?''asked Sora.'' Yes. First we need to get Terra and Riku. Once we find them then they can come along.'' Aqua said being calm. Sora looked at the ocean.' The door to light.'thought Sora as he turned his head and faced Aqua.'' Alright. If Riku's there. Then I can stop him from making the bad choice.''said Sora. They all then went to the ship and went in.' Forgive me. Ansem. I'll come back for you.'thought Aqua as she looked at space of the world.

 

After a while, Sora landed ship in the world where Riku was. Sora got out. He looked at the world.' This looks like the world I fought that guy at.'thought Sora.'' You must stop Riku from making the wrong choice.''said Sora's future shelf.'' Riku. You can't go into that portal. If you do then bad things will happen.''said Sora as he felt the desert wind fly though his hair. Riku then turned around anf faced Sora.'' I'm a master. I'm stronger then you now. You can't stop me Sora.''said Riku as he ran though the portal which closed after he went in.'' Riku.....''wined Sora as he fell on his knees and started crying.

This is getting intense.Please write more.

Very well told my friend, but you never had trouble with plot. Your problem was mostly grammar, but that is slowly disappearing. Now its mostly about length, as far as some chapters could of been extended and more dialogue could be added. You have gotten better with detail and go straight to the point. In other words..not much I can say lol, you started off with a good hook and...I got hooked. Great job I look forward to more.

Cjhapter XIV

Riku

Riku drived further into the darkness. Then Riku saw a pair of red eye's. Riku felt a tingy in his spine. He then disappeared in the ever lasting darkness.

 

Meanwhile, A boy walked in Hollow Bastion up to the castle. He looked at it. He had blue hair that went up to his soldiers. He had a X on his face. It was Isa. Saix's whole being.'' Lea or Axel. Which ever. Why are you not here?''asked Isa.

 

Meanwhile, Xehanort was walking to CO. Then he opened the door and founded a hidden door. He bought out Aqua's keyblade. He then sented a beam to the door. It opened. Xehanort then went in.'' VEN. You need to come with me....''said Xehanort as he saw that Ven's body was not in the chair.

Nice chapter

Chapter XV

Sora

 

A grown man was crying on the ground. Sora couldn't stop crying over not stopping Riku from making a bad choice.

'' Sora, raise your head. We can help Riku. Please.''wispered Aqua. Terra, Donald, and Goofy looked at Sora. Sora then finally stopped crying and raised his head.

'' Guys. There's something I need to do. A few people are hurting. I need to see them. Aqua. I need to go deep inside my heart to see one of them. Use your keyblade to put me to sleep.'' shouted Sora. Aqua looked at him. She then fired her keyblade at him. Sora then screamed in pain and fell asleep.

 

Terranort looked confused. Then a keyblade almost attacked him. The person holding the keyblade had long brown hair, short pants, A pad on his arm, Blue eye's, And he had a keyblade he was holding backwards.

'' Finally. I can get you back.''yelled the boy.