black x feather

Oh I guess you haven't seen (click it- warning side effects such as constant nyaning, annoyance, or win may occur)

Nice I like your style of writing. It has a good amount of background detail, although It can be more interesting if you can add more depth to your details such as a feeling before "DARKNESS". Was something going through his mind or something. And for the "black things" attacking as we can obviously refer to as heartless, did Mark have a strange feeling before they appeared and how did they appear. Idk this is just my thoughts. Don't get me wrong, I like your story so far and I'm not forcing you to change it. Just some thoughtful criticism. Can't wait to see more.

Nice. I like the whole idea of Xehanort being at his young years and all, but I feel something missing from the 1st chapter. That or you did that on purpose.

Be free! and win this game of war for me my nyan cats.

Wonderland... ahhrg! hate that place so far. I still need 3 inklings left. :blink:

Wow thanks you guys. @AnsemTheWise- Thanks for the nice criticism. I thought I would sound lame or something. :lol: @Kingdom Sora- Thanks and sure If I actually write or type my fan fics for once then I guess I'll put it up on this site when I have the chance. @rikunobodyxiii- Thanks I'll be looking forward to... be upon the ranks of kh13. I guess. :rolleyes: @Aaron- Smash Brothers ftw! Yup thats what came to mind at first so I ran with it. I'll sure enjoy my time here thanks.

Yes! I've always wanted to do that. Anyways hey peoples who I have yet to talk to... (cricket noises) oh hi Jiminy cricket. Anyways... I'm not good with intros but I guess all I can say is I have yet to play all kingdom hearts games since I've played only KH2 and seen KH1 and own KH re:coded(damn wonderland is confusing ) And I like coming up with fan fic stories in my head at times and play around with photoshop. (thinks if this is enough as an intro and shrugs, "sure why not")