I--- I am magical! I TOTALLY AM. D:

Why hasn't my magical e-mail come yet? I want my letterrrrrrrrr. I'm a Narwhal darn it all! I'M MAGICAL ENOUGH AREN'T I? D8

 

IVAN, SOMEONE, ANYBODY. WHY IS MY BOX SO LETTER-LESS? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

 

 

I CAN NOT EXPRESS MY NEED FOR THIS SHIT.

 

....You Know forget being a Narwhal. I am now a honey badger. Honey badgers are basically awesome fearless creatures and don't give a shit about nothing. I eat cobras for breakfast! I am an excellent finder, magical and badass. I'm the most fearless creature in the entire animal kingdom. With a wand, I'd be even more badass. What now. D<

 

Don't mind me.... just waiting for the day I accept my fate as a Hufflepuff....because I'm an awesome honey badger.

 

Others can suffer their lack of magical wonders with me. I feel your pain.

 

okay so I'm really just bored and don't really know what to do with myself right now...

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOUR BOX IS LETTERLESS. MINE IS LETTERLESS TOO.

 

COME ON, I KNOW I'M A FREAKING SNAKE AND EVERYTHING, BUT I DESERVE A CHANCE TOO! NOT ALL SNAKES ARE EVIIIIL.

 

 

It's just... I've tried so hard to become a narwhal, and I finally am one. And I'm a snake to boot! I just want to prove myself to the rest of the magical community! But I can't have that chance if I don't get my letter.

YAY HONEY BADGER!! lol

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOUR BOX IS LETTERLESS. MINE IS LETTERLESS TOO.

 

COME ON, I KNOW I'M A FREAKING SNAKE AND EVERYTHING, BUT I DESERVE A CHANCE TOO! NOT ALL SNAKES ARE EVIIIIL.

 

 

It's just... I've tried so hard to become a narwhal, and I finally am one. And I'm a snake to boot! I just want to prove myself to the rest of the magical community! But I can't have that chance if I don't get my letter.

 

Oh, you're a snake? Just so you know I ate your cousin today... sorry for your loss.

 

BUT YESSS WHY ARE WE NOT GOOD ENOUGHHHH? D:

OUR BOXES ARE SO LETTERLESS AND EMPTY. THERE IS A VOID IN OUR LIVES UNTIL THIS LETTER COMESSSSSSSSS.

 

YAY HONEY BADGER!! lol

 

Yay indeed. c:

NOOOO, YOU ATE STEVEN? HE WAS SUCH A GLORIOUS SNAKE. btw can we like, form an alliance so none of your other fellow honey badgers, or you, eat me?

 

BUT NOOOO, EMPTY BOXES. I'M JUST GONNA BE SITTING IN MY REGULAR SCHOOL WAVING A STICK AT MY PEERS AND TEACHERS GOING, "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, HOGWARTS IS MY HOME!" AND I'LL BE SENT AWAY BY THE BIG MEN IN THE WHITE COATS WITH THE BIG NEEDLE AND I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO GET MY LETTER AND THEN I'LL NEVER. BE. WITH. MY. BRETHREN.

Yay Hufflepuff, home of the minor characters. You know, I'm going to embrace my minor-characterness by creating a club. It's going to be called 'Goku can go get his ass kicked so I'm going to make a club for minor characters club.'

The world has lost a great narwhal today. A great and magical narwhal... Also, what kind of letter in what kind of box?

 

NOOOO, YOU ATE STEVEN?

YOU ATE ME?! BUT I DON'T FEEL EATEN! I'M A GLORIOUS RAVEN! Well, technically I'm a hawk, but still...

The world has lost a great narwhal today. A great and magical narwhal... Also, what kind of letter in what kind of box?

 

We're talking about our frustration on how we haven't gotten our emails saying we can use the beta version of Pottermore.

...Did you dare to speak the words of which you shouldn't speak the name of for reasons of empty letterboxes?

....

......

.......POTTTERRMOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

CHEER UP KAISO, WE'RE HALFWAY THEEEEERE. WE'RE LOOKIN' GOOD NOW. BUT NOTHIN'S GONNA GET IN THE WAY! WE'RE HALFWAY THEEERE. AND LOOKIN' BACK NOW, I THOUGHT THAT I'D NEVER SAY, "WE'RE HALF WAY THEEEEEEEERE!"

 

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOUR BOX IS LETTERLESS. MINE IS LETTERLESS TOO.

 

COME ON, I KNOW I'M A FREAKING SNAKE AND EVERYTHING, BUT I DESERVE A CHANCE TOO! NOT ALL SNAKES ARE EVIIIIL.

 

 

It's just... I've tried so hard to become a narwhal, and I finally am one. And I'm a snake to boot! I just want to prove myself to the rest of the magical community! But I can't have that chance if I don't get my letter.

 

Snakes are awesome.