5 Questions With The Kingdom Hearts Cast

[Weiss 8,279]

To Riku: How did you keep Sora's wooden sword safe for him all throughout Kh1? (When he gave the sword back to him at HB)

[Gambler'sApprentice 131]

Riku, in the words of Captain Jack Sparrow, 'You need to find yourself a girl, mate.'

Seriously, all you've done so far is save Sora and moon over Kairi. Obviously excluding the times you were trying to kill Sora, but were still mooning over Kairi.

[Firaga 5,947]

_EPISODE 2_

 

Setting: Same as the last. Except with Riku, That's pretty much how it always is....except with different stars....

 

Riku: (salutes) E-RAH! Welcome, beautiful people, back to 5 Questions (holds up five fingers) With The Kingdom Hearts Cast. The show where everything is made up and the points don't matter, just like Demyx's use of good hair product.

 

Demyx: Ah....I see what you did there....

 

Riku: Ah...I'm sure you do. That wasn't a jab at ol' Demmy by the way, even he knows his hair sucks.

 

Demyx: I've come to love it, actually.

 

Riku:(flatly) Yay. (vigor returning) Anyways, I'm gonna get right to the questions....because unlike a certain brunette I know....I don't bullshit for five minutes before getting down to brass taxes....basically, I'm the Trunks of this cast.

 

Sora: Oh, bravo, you know what the f*ck DragonBall is!

 

Riku: Jelly. Pure jelly. (smirks at Sora) Now, first question....from Onaiku....ah, I see you're also fond of names that end with "ku"...he's asking, "Riku! Do you ever feel like people compare you too much to Sasuke Uchiha? I mean, you both have Emo tendencies, and you both abandoned your friends. So, what are your thoughts about you and Sasuke?" Heh-heh....first off, unlike that dick, I actually redeemed myself....meanwhile, he's still, as the plot of Naruto continues, I might add, running around (twirls finger in circlular motion) being an asshole, and f**king with people's lives.....and I have to ask, what does that pink-haired bitch still see in him?! Shit, the fact that she still attracted to him makes as much sense as these two hookin' up! (points at Kairi and Sora)

 

Kairi: You really wanna go there?

 

Riku: Yes. Because it's true....so f*king true...(shaking his head)....(glances at paper once more) and what do I think of him and me? Well, I'll admit I was like him once....lost and confused...taking everything for granted....and then one day, a older person came to me and told me I could have power beyond anything I could ever imagine....and I accepted....like a dumbass. http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/sleep.png....thank goodness I got outta that deal, or else....ugh, I can't even talk about it. Anyways, with Sasuke....well, I'll admit, I was one of those guys who kinda liked him....you know, back in Part I, when he was less emo and more badass....but once he pulled a me--YES, he pulled a me.....Kishimoto, I know who else you ripped off of...(laughs) I kid, I kid...but, yeah, after he went, uh, down in respectable terms.....uh, yeah, nows he's just a sad little boy....stuck in the past....unlike me, however. Like I said, I made up for my shit...where's Sasuke's change of heart? I tell ya where. Nowhere! This kid's been f**ked up in the head since the UM, and you know this is true. Even you agree with me. (looks at Sora)

 

Sora: Yep! No doubt!

 

Riku: Amen, brother. Besides, I think we can agree I'm alot sexier than Sasuke Uchiha, heh-heh.....fangirls, watching, please scream in unison! (unbuttons jacket, shows off abs)

 

Fangirls (somewhere outside the arena): (Scream so loud, you could hear it from the shooting room)

 

Riku: Now, I don't know about you, but I'm sure Sasuke can't do that. Not a million years, bra....(laughs)

 

Roxas: How the hell do you do that?

 

Riku: (zips up jacket) Practice and patience. Two key words right there. (holds up two fingers)

 

(pause)

 

Sorry, can't finish this right now. Busy. Need two more questions, though, so make sure to send them in! And while you're at it, tell me how the series is going? Have I made you LYAO yet? I hope so.

[Oniaku 280]

_EPISODE 2_

 

Setting: Same as the last. Except with Riku, That's pretty much how it always is....except with different stars....

 

Riku: (salutes) E-RAH! Welcome, beautiful people, back to 5 Questions (holds up five fingers) With The Kingdom Hearts Cast. The show where everything is made up and the points don't matter, just like Demyx's use of good hair product.

 

Demyx: Ah....I see what you did there....

 

Riku: Ah...I'm sure you do. That wasn't a jab at ol' Demmy by the way, even he knows his hair sucks.

 

Demyx: I've come to love it, actually.

 

Riku:(flatly) Yay. (vigor returning) Anyways, I'm gonna get right to the questions....because unlike a certain brunette I know....I don't bullshit for five minutes before getting down to brass taxes....basically, I'm the Trunks of this cast.

 

Sora: Oh, bravo, you know what the f*ck DragonBall is!

 

Riku: Jelly. Pure jelly. (smirks at Sora) Now, first question....from Onaiku....ah, I see you're also fond of names that end with "ku"...he's asking, "Riku! Do you ever feel like people compare you too much to Sasuke Uchiha? I mean, you both have Emo tendencies, and you both abandoned your friends. So, what are your thoughts about you and Sasuke?" Heh-heh....first off, unlike that dick, I actually redeemed myself....meanwhile, he's still, as the plot of Naruto continues, I might add, running around (twirls finger in circlular motion) being an asshole, and f**king with people's lives.....and I have to ask, what does that pink-haired bitch still see in him?! Shit, the fact that she still attracted to him makes as much sense as these two hookin' up! (points at Kairi and Sora)

 

Kairi: You really wanna go there?

 

Riku: Yes. Because it's true....so f*king true...(shaking his head)....(glances at paper once more) and what do I think of him and me? Well, I'll admit I was like him once....lost and confused...taking everything for granted....and then one day, a older person came to me and told me I could have power beyond anything I could ever imagine....and I accepted....like a dumbass. http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/sleep.png....thank goodness I got outta that deal, or else....ugh, I can't even talk about it. Anyways, with Sasuke....well, I'll admit, I was one of those guys who kinda liked him....you know, back in Part I, when he was less emo and more badass....but once he pulled a me--YES, he pulled a me.....Kishimoto, I know who else you ripped off of...(laughs) I kid, I kid...but, yeah, after he went, uh, down in respectable terms.....uh, yeah, nows he's just a sad little boy....stuck in the past....unlike me, however. Like I said, I made up for my shit...where's Sasuke's change of heart? I tell ya where. Nowhere! This kid's been f**ked up in the head since the UM, and you know this is true. Even you agree with me. (looks at Sora)

 

Sora: Yep! No doubt!

 

Riku: Amen, brother. Besides, I think we can agree I'm alot sexier than Sasuke Uchiha, heh-heh.....fangirls, watching, please scream in unison! (unbuttons jacket, shows off abs)

 

Fangirls (somewhere outside the arena): (Scream so loud, you could hear it from the shooting room)

 

Riku: Now, I don't know about you, but I'm sure Sasuke can't do that. Not a million years, bra....(laughs)

 

Roxas: How the hell do you do that?

 

Riku: (zips up jacket) Practice and patience. Two key words right there. (holds up two fingers)

 

(pause)

 

Sorry, can't finish this right now. Busy. Need two more questions, though, so make sure to send them in! And while you're at it, tell me how the series is going? Have I made you LYAO yet? I hope so.

 

*feels bottom*

 

Oh, thank God, it's still there. So that'd be a no.

[Firaga 5,947]

*feels bottom*

 

Oh, thank God, it's still there. So that'd be a no.

 

We're not at the meat of this episode yet, so that's understandable.

[Firaga 5,947]

(unpause)

Riku: Next question! From Keysofblades...he writes.."How did you keep Sora's wooden sword safe for him all throughout Kh1? (When he gave the sword back to him at HB)" (laughs) Normura....this is you (points a Normura) this is you, me, and the wall....heh, here's the thing....you guys call it Normura Logic, but I call it RPG Logic....seriously, in all our games, we have Sora or some other guy carrying around Keyblade keychains, items, objects and munny...and (puts up air quotes) "supposedly" it's all inside their pockets....I mean, you dont' see 'em carrying backpacks or anything, do ya? You see, these are just things that you don't need to worry your pretty little head about, let's be honest here. Do you REALLY wanna know that I kept that sword up my ass? No, you don't. That's why we don't say anything. We just move on.....so please, don't sweat the small stuff. It's the big things that matter....besides....that would hurt ALOT.

Sora: You'd still like it.

Riku: :angry: Cute. Real cute. (sighs)....

(pause)

I would have done the other question, but I already did this over once, and I'd rather not have to do it again....pain in the ass laptop...(grumble, grumble, grumble)....

I should have the next one up tomorrow. 'Til then....3 more questions, please!

Edited February 13, 2013 by Firaga96

[Firaga 5,947]

(unpause)

 

Riku: Question number three up in this bitch!

 

Sora: Did you really jus--

 

Riku: Pipe down, I know it was dumb, too...http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/sleep.png....anyways, from Gambler'sApprentice....he writes, "Riku, in the words of Captain Jack Sparrow, 'You need to find yourself a girl, mate.'Seriously, all you've done so far is save Sora and moon over Kairi. Obviously excluding the times you were trying to kill Sora, but were still mooning over Kairi."

 

(Cast giggles)

 

Riku: (pauses) Well....this may come as a shock to you, KH fans and Rikunites alike....but it just so happens....that I'm in a relationship right now....and its not anyone from the series either...

 

Goofy: I bet she's ugly!

 

Zexion: I bet she's emo!

 

Pete: I bet she's fat!

 

Marluxia: I bet she's a tranny!

 

Riku: Oh, like you're all one to talk! :angry: Ladies and gentleman, you have witnessed pure irony right here...anyways, NO, she is not fat, ugly, emo, nor a tranny (glares at hecklers), but she is black. Just sayin'.

 

Roxas: I call bullshit. How'd you hook up with a supafly sista?

 

Riku: Because I'm the goddamn Riku, that's why. Big, tall...black, white....short or skinny....doesn't matter to me...everyone is welcome to the Riku Experience. (winks)

 

(Cast groans a little)

 

Riku: Oh, and by the way, since I said that, I can also say this--Sparrow!

 

Jack: Ay?

 

Riku: (holds up middle finger)

 

(Cast "ooooooooohs")

 

Riku: That's for you, brother.

 

Jack: ....(walks away) damned silver-haired landlubber...

 

Riku: (hears remark) cough*virgin*cough....OKAY! Time for the next question. Question number four: from--

 

(pause)

 

Two more and we're done, people.

 

{NARUTO: Namikaze Chronicles has just recieved its third chapter. Go to it. Right now.....do it.}

[Kaneki Ken 1,516]

Hey Riku! how can you actually smell darkness?

[Oniaku 280]

To Donald and Goofy: What would you do with Portal Guns? And would you use them to help Sora on his Journey? If so, then how?

[Firaga 5,947]

(unpause)

 

Riku: OKAY! TIme for the next question. Question number four...from Xamtweth-reconnected....holy shit, what a name (chuckles).....he writes, "Hey Riku!", Yes? "..how can you actually smell darkness?" To be honest, when you hang around a certain man for a certain amount of time...(glares backstage) you pick up a few things. I just wish that was the only thing I picked up and/or had to deal with...

 

SOD: Oh, come on, it wasn't that bad!

 

Riku: Yes, it was! :angry: Yes it was.... (clears throat) But anyways, besides that, I think it's actually a nice quirk to have....I mean, it certainly gives me a few badass points, doesn't it? Plus, I used it to kick Zexion's ass (points at Zexion) so for me, that's kinda funny.

 

Zexion: :angry: ....not going to respond....

 

Riku: Why, because you don't have a comeback?

 

Zexion: No, uh, because---because---(sputters) gah, damn you, Riku!

 

Riku: ....why are even you here again? What happened to all the Org. dudes getting their hearts back? I mean, are the Org. XIII Nobodies that popular? Uh, Ansem The Wise, can you give me the totals on the Organization?

 

Ansem The Wise: Ah, yes, let us see....do do....okay, approximatley 569,348,943 more fangirls belong to the members of Organization XIII than any of their original Sombodies.

 

(Org.XIII boast with shouts like "yeah!" and "whoo!")

 

Riku: Thanks, dude. Hey, give it up for Ansem The Wise. He's so smart, we made him our official fact checker.

 

(camera shows Ansem The Wise sitting at a table with headphones on. He gives a peace sign and chuckles as the other cast members give him a round of applause.)

 

Riku: Yeah, he's the one with all the answers, ladies and jellyfish, we just have, like, five. Five we think up at the spot even.

 

Ansem The Wise: Oh, yes, and might I add that your fanbase just skyrocketed up a couple fans?

 

Riku: Really? That's awesome! You see, I was just about ask about my fanbase, and here he is, answering something I didn't even ask yet...he's psychic, I say! You know what, I'm gonna think of something to say to him and I betcha he'll tell me the answer even before that--

 

(anonymous): Okay, we get it, let's move on.

 

Riku: Hey! :angry: Don't tell me to move on! We are in the presence of genius here. (points at Ansem The Wise) 569,348,943 fangirls and-and the answer to a question I haven't even asked! (stares at anonymous with weird face)

 

(anonymous): (low volume) You got plenty time to suck his dick later.

 

Riku: -______- ..... I f**king hate you....I really do....one of these days, you and I are gonna have an old fashioned melee...a Donny Brook--a Pier Sixer! That's right, we're skipping Pier 5 but we're not quite up to Pier 7...cuz they're tough bastards over there....but whether I'm standin' or not...(raises finger) I will.....(pauses)....go down swingin'! (swings arm down, then turns back to camera) You all know who I'm talkin' to....(points backstage) that STUPID son of a bitch!

 

(anoynomus): (muffled)

 

Riku: Oh no. No no no no no no no no, I'm not doing that. I'm not bringing your government name into this. Not gonna give ya the press time, Bill f**king Farmer! Foghorn f**king Leghorn! Makoto f**king Date! (throws hands up) Secret f**king Sqirrell....I HATE YOU! .... Stop it, I'm getting to the next question....(sigh) question five...--

 

(pause)

 

One more question is all I need.

 

BTW: Next episode is Kairi.

Edited September 28, 2012 by Firaga96

[Kaneki Ken 1,516]

u should make a short scene behind the stage scene of KH characters comment why it's taking so long for KH13 users to make the 5th question for riku.

[Oniaku 280]

Ugh... To Riku: What would you do if Sora decided to be gay and returned all your sexual advances?

[Firaga 5,947]

Ugh... To Riku: What would you do if Sora decided to be gay and returned all your sexual advances?

 

U mad?

[Oniaku 280]

U mad?

 

Nope, let me ask a better question:

 

[Firaga 5,947]

Nope, let me ask a better question:

 

http-~~-//www.youtube.com/watch?v=XREnvJRkif0

 

Seriously? Or is this just....

 

Never mind. I'll put the first one in...

 

u should make a short scene behind the stage scene of KH characters comment why it's taking so long for KH13 users to make the 5th question for riku.

 

Maybe...

[Firaga 5,947]

(pause)

 

Riku: (Sigh) Question five.....closin' it out....from Oniaku....oh, another one from this guy, this oughta be fun. He writes."What would--" 0-o...."What would you do if Sora decided to be gay and returned all your sexual advances?" -___-

 

(Cast can't breath, they are too busy laughing, even Sora)

 

(A/N: Oniaku...don't take this personally....it's just for comedy....)

 

Riku: (crumples up paper, throws it towards camera) RUN, ONIAKU! RUN, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! :angry: :angry: You have got to be the slimiset piece of banta-fodder to think those two things! One (holds up one finger) that (points at Sora with other hand) this little jerk would have ANY chance with me!

 

Sora: I second that to be honest....

 

Riku: Two (holds up another finger) is that you accuse ME of being GAY!!! -____- .... (wipes face) I can't take this.....I can't STAND....to think that my character is being put out as a goddamn homosexual.....not that I'm against that stuff, but in my world, I DON"T CARE FOR IT! :angry: .....Ugh......must erase images from brain.....

 

Goofy: Are we done now?

 

Riku: Yes! Yes....you motherf**ker.....we're done. Onaiku, please don't assume I like Sora in that way.....I-I-I wouldn't even TRY....even IF I was like that.....(takes breath) .... Okay....we're done. 5 Questions are done today. Next time, Kairi (points to Kairi) gets to bleed all over the stage.

 

Kairi: Oh, f**k you.

 

Riku: So for two episodes of 5 Questions (holds up two fingers) heh-heh....I AM GONE, and I still HATE YOU BOTH! (points at both Sora and Goofy)

 

Sora and Goofy: :angry:

 

Riku: 0-0.....I'm the Goddamn Riku. (bolts)

 

 

X*X*X*X*X

 

Remember, next episode is Kairi. Send in them questions!

Edited September 29, 2012 by Firaga96

[Weiss 8,279]

To Kairi:

What exactly happened during chain of memories? You went from just living on an island to actually going to school. Why?

So.....Sora or Riku? Which would you date?

[Firaga 5,947]

_EPISODE 3_

 

Kairi: Hi! Kairi here! Heh, how y'all doing? Ha-ha! We have speed! We have clearance! We are here in the studio! Can you hear the echo? That's the toilet....I

ll be in there later.....we have questions, from you! (points at screen) Which I will answer, right now! But before...I do....heh, I'll, uh, go on record by saying that we are slowly getting too controversial for the internet....Normura.....he's so f**king pissed right now. Now I bet you're wondering, WHO deems us too controversial for the internet? Who would do such a thing? The list is long and disguished......you're probably thinkin' about guys like..... Maleficent, Xehanort....maybe even The Queen Of Hearts or Ursula.....but no.....(sighs).....Aladdin. Mother....f**king.....Aladdin. From NOWHERESVILLE! (throws hands up)

 

(Cast laughs)

 

Kairi: Seriously, where's he from? What part of India is Agrabah at?

 

Ansem The Wise: Uh, it remains to be seen. In fact, it appears he has moved to Philadephia

 

Kairi: Oh, and he's not even in Agrabah anymore! :wacko: ...heh, kidding....we, uh, don't actually live in the "worlds", no....but anyways, it's gone rotten.....uh, long story short, Aladdin has become the new head-honcho....internet.... extravaganza....he's got all the bells and whistles....he's got a lanyard with this face painted on it...that makes him important....and he says we're too controversial, and we're not even worthy of being on the KH13 site. But you know what, he's right! We need to be locked down and tucked away because (in weird voice, as he throws her hands up) it's crazy! .... How crazy is it? We're about to find out...

 

(Cast murmurs a little, some chuckling)

 

Kairi: Question number one, fr--uh, hmm, there's two here, so questions one and two....from Keysofblades...."What exactly happened during Chain of Memories? You went from just living on an island to actually going to school. Why?" This is simple to answer, actually....first thing, i was HOME...where I was supposed to be, and TWO I had to go to school because I couldn't spend all my time on the play island waitin' on my two boy-toys...

 

Sora: Wait, what?

 

Kairi: I'm just joking...

 

Sora: Oh, okay.

 

Riku: Well, I certainly take offense to it.

 

Kairi: I know you do, Riku....(whispers) I know you do... :angry:....mooning over me, what am I, a damn doll?!

 

Riku: Hey, I didn't say that.

 

Kairi: (grumbles) Well, anyways, that's all I can say: I had a life to live, didn't I? Besides, I forgot all about Sora and Riku during that time period so I was convinced that I could have a normal life....not that I do now....I mean, shit, this Keyblade stuff is fun!

 

Mickey Mouse: Whattaya talking' about?! You haven't done jacksquat yet!

 

Kairi: I WILL once we get the next game out...people who beat DDD, you know what I'm talkin' about....yeah, it's MY turn to shine! (raise arm)

 

Sora: Yeah!

 

Kairi: Ha-ha....well, uh, let's continue shall we....Blades's next question is...."So.....Sora or Riku? Which would you date?" Hmm....I think its already established that I'm with Sora...

 

Sora: Aw, yeah.

 

Kairi: (giggles) (blows kiss) And, I think its also established that the other choice would be....ugh....no, just forget that.

 

Riku: Hey, Kaiku could go places. I'm just Saiyan.

 

Kairi: Uh, no it wouldn't.

 

RIku: Why not?

 

Sora: Cuz you're a douchebag to her.

 

Riku: What? I am not!

 

Kairi: Dude, you insulted me last episode a bunch of times! Meanwhile, sweet little Sora over here doesn't give me shit! He's actually a pleasure to be around.

 

Sora: Well, thank yo kindly.

 

Kairi: No problem....(winks)....You know what, I'm surprised you haven't beat the shit out of Riku yet. (puts hands on hips)

 

Sora: I'm almost there. Luckily for you (turns to Riku) we're buddies, so you get special priveledges, know what I'm sayin'?

 

Riku: You know I could kick your ass, right? Real talk?

 

Sora: Dude, the only thing you could beat me in was in race. If you haven't noticed, I'm OP up the ass, now.

 

Riku: What?

 

Sora: Let's count the ways: Abilities, Drive Forms, Dream Eaters, Summons, Magic, Mah Two Homeboys Donald and Goofy.,,,yeah, I got you beat, man.

 

Riku: Hey, I can do some of that shit, too, ya know.

 

Sora: But not as good as (sing-song voice) me.....considering your screen time and playabiltiy is small as hell compared to mine.

 

Riku (stutters)

 

Kairi: Those aren't the only things you have that you have that's bigger than Riku's...

 

(Cast "ooohhh", Sora chuckles)

 

Kairi: He-he-he....

 

Riku: -___-

 

Kairi: Okay, let's move on before Riku blows a gasket....and you know he will....Question three (holds up three fingers, shuffles through papers) --

 

(pause)

 

X*X*X*X*X

 

Riku bashing up the ass, right? lol, I'm sorry....I have nothing against Master Riku, I just think its fun to sell him off as narcisstic....cuz really, it works, right? lol.

 

Okay, two down, three to go! Leave me them there question, ya hear?

Edited September 29, 2012 by Firaga96

[Kaneki Ken 1,516]

Kairi, Now that you have the keyblade, are you gonna be training with Lea? He is a newbie like you.

[XIIISwords 1,059]

Kairi, would you rather share a paupu fruit with Donald or Goofy?

[Kaneki Ken 1,516]

Kairi, would you rather share a paupu fruit with Donald or Goofy?

 

OMG, I definitely want to see Kairi's reaction to this question!

[Firaga 5,947]

*unpause*

 

Kairi: Question three....from Xamtweth-reconnected....oh my God, I love your avatar .... It'd be cuter if It was Sora in there though. Just Saiyan. Anyways, he writes, "Kairi, Now that you have the keyblade, are you gonna be training with Lea? He is a newbie like you." Huh. Interesting thought. I, uh, guess so? It would make sense. Maybe since Ol' Silver is a Keyblade Master, he'll be our teacher.

 

Lea: Probably.

 

Kairi: Yeah....hey, wait a minute, how come your Lea again? Aren't you supposed to be Axel?

 

Lea: Nope it's Lea.

 

Kairi: (pauses)

 

Lea: Uh....

 

Kairi: I'm waiting.

 

Lea: Oh, right, uh...(clears throat) Got it memorized?!

 

Kairi: As a matter of fact I do. (laughs) But what I don't have memorized is how the flip you got your heart back again after, apparently, you and all the other Organization members we're present for the last two episodes as your Nobody forms...

 

Lea: I blame the script writer.

 

Kairi: Me too.

 

.......

 

Eh, I did kinda mess up, so I'll let it slide....

 

Kairi: Anyways, now that you think about it, that sounds pretty interesting....I mean, think about it: My man's gonna be gone for a little while, at least at the beginning of the story...so, it'll be up to me, Lea, and RIku to keep the story going...so....

 

Lea: Uh-huh....

 

Kairi: What if....the three of us....

 

Lea: I like where this is going....

 

Kairi: Were all playable characters at the start!

 

Lea: 0-0....that's genius! But, uh, how would it work?

 

Riku: Yeah, how would it work, Fem-mura?

 

Kairi: Uh...I'll ignore that last comment....and anyways, I think it'd be kinda cool to have us all in one party (makes weaving motions with hands)....and be able to switch out between each Keyblader at will! Like Marvel Ulitmate Alliance!

 

Lea: Oh, cool! I like those games!

 

Riku: Weren't you in them?

 

Lea: Nah, you're thinking about Quinton Flynn. Totally different guy. We kinda sound the same, though.

 

Riku: Ah.

 

Kairi: Anyways, that's just my two cents 'bout it....so, yeah, that'd be kind of nice. After all, uh....(cough) My relationship with Lea is kinda...rocky...

 

Lea: Oh, yeah, because I kidnapped you and...

 

Kairi: Yeah, it was kinda weird....but from here on out, it's all water under the bridge....pretty soon, we'll be best buddies and we be partyin' togetha like its the night after Kingdom Hearts: Dream Drop Distance's US Lauch! You know what that's like, Ansem, you were there.

 

Ansem: Indeed. Also, if I may, I would like to tell you that Aladdin is the "Official Manager Of Web Content."

 

Kairi: I have just been informed of Aladdin's new title....apparently he is "The Biggest Shithead On The Face Of The Planet Having To Do With The Internet". That's it right? Yeah?

 

Ansem: Um. no, it is "Official Manager Of Web Content".

 

Kairi: Okay, then...."Official Manager Of Web Content"....so he gets to decide what's cool and what's not cool. -__- ... KH13.com....your fate of style, trends, and coolness....lies on the unbelievably suave shoulders.........of Aladdin..... :wacko: (covers mouth with hand) ... I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.....

 

*pause*

 

X*X*X*X*X

 

That last part made me lol....now, I'll finish this, once I have one more question for Kai-Kai.

 

Until then, Hasta La Pasta!

Edited September 30, 2012 by Firaga96

[Gambler'sApprentice 131]

So Kairi, are you going to be the brains of the Kairi, Sora, Riku trio since you're the only one to have regular schooling, and if so what would you be doing exactly.

[Firaga 5,947]

*unpause*

 

Kairi: Gambler'sApprentice wants to know..."So Kairi, are you going to be the brains of the Kairi, Sora, Riku trio since you're the only one to have regular schooling, and if so what would you be doing exactly?" Um, well I'm sorry to say that considering there is a HUGE difference in using knowledge in school and using knowledge in Kingdom Hearts...i.e....and I mean....a big ass difference!

 

(Kairi and Cast laugh)

 

Kairi: I mean, I don't know how you play Kingdom Hearts, Apprentice, but, I for one, have never even thought of, like, fighting the Heartless with the mighty power of SOCIAL STUDIES on my side....is that what you mean?

 

Sora: Well, uh, I think that most of that stuff can apply in some situations...

 

Kairi: Like how?

 

Sora: For example....uh....hmm...actually this is pretty tough...

 

Kairi: If you can't give me an answer, then why even respond?!

 

Sora: Just tryin' to help...

 

Kairi: Aw...I'm sorry....just can't think straight.....Apprentice you're gettin' my goat, I can tell ya that, heh....Ansem, you're smart. Anything to add?

 

Ansem The Wise: In a manner of speaking, you might be able to grasp certain concepts of combat in more strategic ways than what Sora or Riku may formulate....for example....I would assume given your age, you would have attended a high level algebra class....

 

Kairi: Oh, yeah. I had AP everything. (laughs)

 

AnsemL Well, given that notion, it could be said that your aptitude gives you the ability to map out different routes or paths for you and the others to follow....or configure the trajectory of different attacks that require long-distance range. Also, you may show the ability to use any schooling you have in the subject of English to help solve any puzzles you may encounter across the many worlds you will visit.

 

Kairi: Huh.....uh, yeah, what he said. I hope that answers your question....anyways, now we have question five....last one, guys and gals...from XIIISwords....your pic is pretty .... he says, "Kairi, would you rather share a paupu fruit with Donald or Goofy?" 0-0.

 

Donald and Goofy:

 

Kairi: (blushes) Uh...heh, Oh my God....uh, this is a tough call.....uh, S-Sora, you know these guys the best, who would choose?

 

Sora: I don't know, uh.....you know what, I'd go with Goofy.

 

Goofy: Yahoo!

 

Donald: Wak?! Sora, you asshole!

 

Sora: Hey, man, you're the one with the anger problem. Maybe if you chilled out once in a while -

 

Donald: I DO NOT HAVE AN ANGER PROBLEM!!! (untelligible Donald style yelling / gibberish)

 

Sora: 0-0....Mick?

 

Mickey: I got this....(hits Donald over the head with Kingdom Key D) Donald, control yourself, man.

 

Donald: (rubbing his head) Yeah, yeah.....(grumbles) Kairi....(mumbles).....red-haired slut....

 

Kairi: http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/ohmy.png.....Oh, um, I'm sorry what? What'd you just say?

 

Sora: Yeah, what did you say, Donald? (cracks knuckles) Care to repeat?

 

Donald: Uh..... :angry: tch, nothing.....

 

Sora and Kairi: Thought so.

 

Kairi: Well, anyways, I would sure as hell go with Goofy....he is a lot nicer, and surprisingly enough smarter.

 

Goofy: Gee, you really think so?

 

Kairi: Yeah. Course. After all, if Sora and Feather But over here (points at Sora and Donald) listened to you more often....you'd be a lot better off. (laugh) I mean, weren't you the only one out of you and Donald to actually care that Pluto picked up Sora's scent in KH1?

 

Goofy: Uh, yeah.....Donald just called me a big palooka....

 

Donald: Well, it's hard to trust your opinion when you're a klutz and a moron!

 

Goofy: Well, looks who's talking, Mr. Anger Management.

 

Donald: I DON"T HAVE ANGER PROBLEMS!!! (jumps at Goofy)

 

(They break into brawl....sound of Goofy's nose being broken.....sound of Donald's ribs being broken)

 

Kairi: Oh my God! Stop them!

 

Riku: Yeah, Donald, kick his ass!

 

Kairi: Riku, you're not helping!

 

Riku: Never said I was!

 

(SMACK!)

 

Riku: Ooh....that's gonna leave a mark.

 

Sora: Okay, enough of this...(whips out Kingdom Key) STOP! (uses Stop spell)

 

(Donald and Goofy stop in place.....Donald is on top of Goofy, hands around his neck....Goofy is on the ground, tonge extended out of mouth like Bart Simpson)

 

Sora: I'll go take care of these two...(drags out of studio)

 

Kairi: Well.....another hectic episode of 5 Questions With The Kingdom Hearts Cast....remember to send in more questions for more episodes....oh, and just a little note....if you want to send in questions, you don't have to limit yourself to KH13.com....because as it turns out.....there is a book....that contains our faces.....that your are able to post stuff on! That's right, we have come to terms with Normura and have decided to set up the official KH Facebook page! You can find it at--

 

Ansem The Wise: Sorry to interrupt, but as it turns out, Tetsuya Normura cancelled that.

 

Kairi: Wait, what? WHAT?! He told me specifically to plug this! Goddamn it! (throws papers on the ground)... What is your problem, Normura?! (looks to side of the screen)

 

Normura: 0-0....

 

Kairi: You are a fountain of misinformation.....and a communist!! (pauses, looks back to camera with weird face) Communist....(laughs) Well, I guess no Facebook then...just totally blew my big finish...you-you sunk my battleship. What can I say? (laughs) Well, then all I can say now is this: keep sendin' in those questions, we'll keep answering 'em, and keep getting FLAMED by motherf**king Aladdin....for just being too nasty. (brushes shoulder, flips out collar) Brush that dirt off ya shoulder, we still cripsy. (begins to walk off set, but turns back and points at screen) Make sure to buy KH1.5 Remix. (walks off for real)

 

X*X*X*X*X

 

Another episode done. Next up is ma boi, Roxas.

 

Do what Kairi said and send in some questions...

Edited September 30, 2012 by Firaga96

[_The Door To Light_ 1,507]

This is gonna be good

Kairi, what is your reaction to all the KH fans out there being able to see your panties thanks to a certain camera trick?