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Posted

I was nervous before I began as it had been some time (probably just a couple days in reality) since I had last wielded a Q-Tip to clean the insides of my ears. I had showered about three hours previous so they were particularity dry, which bothered me a bit.

Not to be deterred, I filled a plastic cup (which I had on the counter for general drinking and post-brushing-rinsing purposes) with water then dumped it down the drain, leaving what I wanted all along: a small amount of water in the bottom to moisten the cotton tip of my small weapon.

 

Unfortunately, I pretty much soaked it, which means my ears are a bit wet at the moment. My second attempt to moisten the other side was just as unsuccessful, so the entire experience was totally awkward now.

Nevertheless, when I surveyed the carnage I had wreaked upon my unsuspecting ears, I found very little yellow-y waste. At first I was satisfied because people passing by who had the nerve to visually measure how much earwax residue remained in the fleshy bowls on the side of my head would be satisfied and would not mentally regard me as a slob. Then I wondered if I was just not producing enough and if so, what is wrong with my ears. Perhaps I should eat a bit better ( I don't eat a lot of junk food, but I do love candy ) or maybe I should exercise more.

 

I can't help but think that this is somehow my mother's fault.

Featured Replies

WHY is this not in writing?? HAVE I repped you yet?

  • Author

Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing? Writing?

 

 

wat

*sniff* beautiful. The dramatic story of a boy...and hid Q-tip. They travelled through this world together, facing countless challenges and obstacles in their path. But one day...mutiny was abroad the young Chronic Tumor's mind as he strangled his dear friend inside the very soles of his ears. And that was the end of dear Q-tip...

  • Author

That's shit.

 

I never loved that q-tip

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