So I have an new idea for a series. I've given this some thought and I really think we have some fun with this. I'm not really doing anything relevant with 5 Q's at the moment anyway, and until I get the extra stuff for that series done and can continue putting out new content for it, I might as well start something new, right?

 

Well, let's see where this takes us...

 

-- EPISODE 1: Fast Track To Failure

 

Hello, KH13. My name is Firaga Sensei. And say hello to my three friends, Sora, Riku, and Kairi.

 

Sora: Hi. 

 

Kairi: Hello. 

 

Riku: Hey.

 

Today is a great day for these three friends; they're going to embark on a great adventure, one that will be full of action, adventure... and unicorns.

 

Sora: Wait, what?

 

Well, that depends, actuallly, I mean, personally, I don't think unicorns would fit into this story. I'd rather see something like dragons or elves or even a giant marshmallow filled with cream chee--

 

Riku: Hey! What are you talking about?!

 

Wait, you guys can hear me?

 

Kairi: Of course we can hear you!

 

Hmm. That was quick. I thought I had the fourth wall reinforced... should have used steel instead of pillows, I guess.

 

Sora: Who are you exactly? We've never seen you before.

 

What do you mean you've never seen me?? We do 5 Questions togeth-- oh wait. I forgot about the memory wipe. Better just keep that to myself for now... probably shouldn't reveal anything else to them either.

 

Kairi: Memory what?

 

Riku: Alright, I need answers. Just what is going on?

 

Okay, okay, I'm going to level with you guys. You're about to be subjected to your greatest adventure yet, and I'm the guy that's going to narrate it all.

 

Sora: You're a narrator?

 

No shit, Sherlock, I just said that. (Sigh) Sharp as a tack, you are.

 

Riku: How come we need a narrator?

 

Because much like your lives in general, this adventure is going to be controlled by people you don't even know.

 

Kairi: Our lives are being controlled?

 

Sorta. Technically, you guys don't even exist.

 

All: WHAT?!

 

Sora: Okay, now you're just trying to mess with our minds!

 

Too late for that. I'm already in your mind.

 

Sora: What! No, you're not! (closes eyes, takes breath) I'll be safe here. He's not coming inside here...

 

(in Sora's mind) I'm in ya head, bitch!

 

Sora: AH! (eyes snap open)

 

Okay, enough formalities. I think you chuckleheads get the main jist of this now.

 

Sora: Well, uh, I guess...

 

Riku: Sora, you can't be seriously going along with this.

 

Kairi: I don't think we have a choice, Riku. We might as well.

 

Riku: You too, Kairi?

 

Sora: Let's just see what happens. It might be fun, who knows.

 

Riku: (sigh) ... fine. I'll play along. But if things get weird, I'll have something to say about it.

 

We'll see if you'll be able to say anything at all...

 

Riku: What?

 

TURTLES, now, the first thing we should get out of the way is the setting. Right now... there is no setting. You guys are basically just sitting in a big black room at the moment.

 

Sora: No, we're not. We're on our home world, Destiny Isl--

 

(snaps fingers, SRK are now in the big black room)

 

Sora: --or, not. Nevermind...

 

Now then, let's put you guys in a more "exciting" setting.

 

Kairi: I don't think I'm gonna like this...

 

Riku: Let me guess, it's gonna be something stupid.

 

Ooh, I know! How about the magical land of Agrabah?

 

Riku: Oh, that's not bad.

 

Sora: Alright! Now I can introduce Riku and Kairi to Aladdin!

 

ExceptI'mputtingyouguysinthemiddleofthedesert.

 

All: What?!

 

SHAPLABLOOEY! (snaps fingers, teleports the three to Agrabah)

 

(SRK stand 50 feet above the desert of Agrabah)

 

Let's hope they have something soft to land on... ooh, I know! ... Nothing.

 

ALL: WHAT THE HE--

 

(They all fall to the ground)

 

All: --EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLL!

 

(SPLAT!)

 

Sora: Ow.

 

Whoops, I guess nothing was a bad choice.

 

Riku: Oh really now?! (stands up and straightens back)

 

Kairi: How much more of this do we have to take? (brushes sand off) It's only been five minutes and we've already been launched into the middle of nowhere.

 

Riku: See, this is why we should have backed out.

 

Sora: Whattaya mean? You agreed to this too.

 

Riku: I'm only agreed so I can make sure you two idiots don't get killed.

 

Kairi: Hey, we're not idiots!

 

Riku: Well, I don't know-- your track records speak for themselves.

 

(Watching this all unfold, not amused) Oh God... (sigh)

 

Sora: You're the one who turned evil, Riku!

 

Riku: I did it to save Kairi!

 

Kairi: And what a glorious job you did. By the way, if you can't tell, I'm being saracastic.

 

Riku: Oh, you can show emotions? That's a first.

 

Kairi: (Gasp) Hey!

 

(All three kids argue with each other)

 

... This is taking too long... SILENCE!!

 

(thunder crackle)

 

All: (stops arguing) ... 

 

Alright, maggots, listen up. We're burning daylight. Now then, KH13, this the part where you chip in and help with the story. I'm giving you three choices onto what these three are going to do next. Here they are:

 

Are they going to --

 

A} continue arguing like little bitches, leading to a hilarious duel,

 

B} go to Agrabah by me transporting them again (wink, wink) 

 

C} A random Heartless/random creature appears and SRK have to fight it.

 

Leave your choices below and we'll see what the outcome will be in one week's time.

 

Sora: Wait, what's the wink, wink thing for?

 

Riku: Are... are you coming onto us?

 

Kairi: Aren't you, like, 40, or something, cuz that's kinda weird...

 

.... I'm gonna enjoy torturing these numbskulls.

 

All: Huh?

 

BANANAS! VOTE NOW!

 

(throws down smoke bomb, dissapears)

 

-- END --

 

Alright, so there's that. I, uh, don't really have anything new to add, so just remember to vote for the next outcome. Allons-y.

Edited August 22, 201312 yr by Firaga Sensei

Those bloopers X'D

Riku: Hi. My name is Riku.

 

Sora: And I'm Sora.

 

Riku: We're here to break some bad news to you guys.

 

Sora: That's right. The Bullshit Chronicles, unfortunately, is being put on hiatus.

 

(Audience boos)

 

Riku: Yes, I know, we expected that...

 

(Riku gets pelted with a rotten tomato)

 

Riku: ... I didn't expect that though... (tomato slowly runs down his face)

 

Sora: We know that this isn't the first time that our boss, Firaga Sensei, has put one of his projects on hold. His last project, 5 Questions With The Kingdom Hearts Cast, whatever that's about, has already been put on hold for what seems like years.

 

Riku: Despite not knowing much about it, we still understand that many people have been waiting for new content to be added to 5 Questions for a while. On his behalf, we apologize for Firaga on not fulfilling his duty on that, and also for putting his project on hold as well.

 

Sora: Rest assured, Firaga doesn't want these projects to end. It's just that he's got a lot of personal business he's going through right now, and he doesn't have as much time as he'd like to spend on stuff like this as he used to.

 

Riku: Sometimes, you just have to push things aside and focus on the important things in your lives, folks. Anyways, that's all we have for you. Sora: Bye. (waves)

 

(Audience claps)

 

Riku: Okay, now can somebody throw me something to get this gunk off?

 

(Audience member throws a clean rag at Riku's face)

 

Riku: Thanks.

 

Sora: Oh yeah, and before we go, Firaga Sensei says that he wants to put out a new episode for BC, since he was supposed to do it last week. All he needs to see 10 likes on this post to do it. He'd also like to see some people post some comments down below, so he can sure that people want to see this continue. Oh yeah, and if you want to see some new 5 Questions stuff, then go post there too. He says its kinda dead and it could use some more people posting there too. Anyways, bye for real. (waves again)

Edited November 1, 201311 yr by Firaga Sensei

Hey, there's no need for you to rush things or apologize.  We all understand you need time to handle and take care of stuff.  I'm sure everyone had to or will do it too sometime.  Just go on ahead with what you have to deal with.

Take ur time firaga sensei ,Nya

And you just had to make me post this thing...