Tonight marks the night my aunt is giving birth to her son, and ultimately my new cousin. I waited all day for something to happen, and finally I received a text that she was having the baby. This also meant I would be stuck at my college for a while before someone would pick me up. So I waited outside in the cold for someone to come, and finally I was able to be driven to the hospital. At this point, I was exhausted from standing outside from the cold, and I was wet from the rain. So I was given two options when I was picked up; wait at the hospital until my new cousin came so I could see him tonight, or get a key from my grandparents so I could go home and rest.

 

I picked the latter.

 

I don't have a damn clue why I even chose that, and by the time I changed my mind it was already too late. The person I was riding with had to be somewhere, and didn't have enough time to turn around, as we were already miles down the road. Maybe I was just tired and that clouded my thoughts or something stupid like that, but I just don't understand; I was excited for this baby to come, and now that he's finally coming, I ditched the entire family in favor of my own needs. I don't have a license, so I can't drive back myself, or else I would have. I must be the biggest asshole of the year...

No, I wouldn't think that way. You were tired and given the option to correct that. It's only logical that someone would take that approach. Don't be too hard on yourself because of that. 

 

Then again, exhaustion does have a direct impact on judgement and focus, so that's also an explanation...

You'd be a jerk if you didn't even give it a second thought- the fact you feel guilty and regret your decision shows just how considerate you are! ^^ Considering the circumstances, you made the most obvious choice as you needed to rest and recuperate- you'll have plenty of opportunities to meet with your new cousin, and now the first time you two meet you won't be cold and tired- you'll be able to enjoy the meeting even more!

Tonight marks the night my aunt is giving birth to her son, and ultimately my new cousin. I waited all day for something to happen, and finally I received a text that she was having the baby. This also meant I would be stuck at my college for a while before someone would pick me up. So I waited outside in the cold for someone to come, and finally I was able to be driven to the hospital. At this point, I was exhausted from standing outside from the cold, and I was wet from the rain. So I was given two options when I was picked up; wait at the hospital until my new cousin came so I could see him tonight, or get a key from my grandparents so I could go home and rest.

 

I picked the latter.

 

I don't have a damn clue why I even chose that, and by the time I changed my mind it was already too late. The person I was riding with had to be somewhere, and didn't have enough time to turn around, as we were already miles down the road. Maybe I was just tired and that clouded my thoughts or something stupid like that, but I just don't understand; I was excited for this baby to come, and now that he's finally coming, I ditched the entire family in favor of my own needs. I don't have a license, so I can't drive back myself, or else I would have. I must be the biggest asshole of the year...

 

 

Exhaustion defeats even the best of us. Once, when I was reading a book, I misread "searched the 12 drawers on the shelf" as "searched the 12 dwarves on the shelf."

 

You'd only be an ass if you didn't regret it.

 

Look to the users above for extra support ^

 

 

ps; I've also done even worse things while exhausted. The key here is not to loathe what you did, but learn from your mistake.

Edited October 30, 201312 yr by -iAD

You're being entirely too hard on yourself..

the fact that you cared enough to be guilty should be good enough

and besides, im sure your family members would tell you go to and have some rest.

and again beeesiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiidessssssssss, would you rather see your cousin on the day he's born but practically feel dead or see him the day after (or the closest available time) knowing that your able to spend your time with him and not feel like you're going to die from lack of sleep