( I haven't posted anything I actually freaking FINISHED, but this is already done: 13 chapters only, though, pretty straight forward plot, and not a ton of characters. Rated 17 for language, blood, action, and mild boy on boy insinuation

And I'd REALLY like feedback, because I think it's pretty good, and pretty much original in plot and all. )

 

1: Angel
I awoke, blinking in the harsh light, my back aching from having had slept oh so wrongly on it last night. 
Last night....
Pretty hazy, best not to really think of it probably. 
I stood, stretching, then winced at the pressure on my wrist, the ace bandage only really doing so much for a shattered bone. 
Hey: punching the firetruck out of a guy roughly the size of The Rock'll do that, but I heal fast, faster than normal. 
You'll see what I mean later. 
I walked to the edge of the low slung cave, ducking under the entrance's overhang to watch the sun rise up over the valley below. 
I grinned, and stepped off the ledge, air rushing past me, as my wings unfurled, catching the air and drifting me upwards towards the new light like a comment shot into orbit. 
Life was good. 

Edited June 27, 201411 yr by Jack Frost

i like it

i like it

I'll get chapter two up soon: I have all 13 up and ready to go. 

Edited June 28, 201411 yr by Jack Frost

alright! looking foward to it! X3

alright! looking foward to it! X3

CX

UPDATE: I LIED: only chap 2. Sorry.  

Edited July 11, 201411 yr by Jack Frost

( I Said I'd post it. And twist: parallel worlds, author and creation. Will they meet? Who knows. ) 

2. Dream Lost
I blinked: this was good. 
Like..really good. 
Pushing my glasses up my nose AGAIN, I hit save, the music player kicking over to reloop Angel With A Shotgun again. 
Most of my writing went nowhere: This angel idea seemed decent enough, but who knew anymore? 
People'd read anything these days as long as it has sex, blood, and gore. 
Well, no sex, but this story didn't have a happy ending from my pre-draft: this angel was doomed to fall, despite anything he did.
I worried it was too short: people were picky about that, but it was too late now: it was saved and uploaded to the site. 
The words were out: there was no way to get them back. 
I switched off the computer, and went to bed. 1 am...

1 am...
The moon looks prettier over the desert than anywhere else. 
Why was I in the desert? 
Heh...reasons, muchacho. 
I love vaugery: less info, the better. 
you'd better get used to it if you're gonna tag along. 
I stretched out, my wings fully extended on the dry sand, watching the stars. 
My mind dragged up an old legend of every star being another person who was watching you back in a neverending stream of souls, all close but never touching. 
Lying here, I almost believed it.

Edited July 11, 201411 yr by Jack Frost

Im really liking it!!! good job! *Hi-five* CX

Im really liking it!!! good job! *Hi-five* CX

Thanks. *high five* 

UPDATE: I've been behind on my writing, but chapter's 3 and 4 are prewritten, but needed a redraft due to typo's.

I'll post them this weekend. 

3: Stilled  Parallel

 

The dancers swirled gracefully, the lush sounds of a string orchestra making beautiful backgrounds to this lavish display of colour and motion. 

 

I stared at the screen: a ball scene. For? For whom? Where? Why?

Without being able to answer these questions, the story had no point, no reason to continue. 

I didn't want to delete it: it seemed like a good opening. 

I saved it to a new file besides Dark Angel, and switched back over to my winged creation to finish up the next chapter: the reviews on Poststory.com seemed pretty positive, but they wanted to know why he was as he was, a winged creature. I figured it could still be teased out over a few more chapters, as the only reasons I could come up with were fallen angel or a Maximum Ride rip off. 

Putting on the soundtrack to my favorite anime ever, Dark Knight, I stared some more at the blinking cursor, which seemed to mock me in it's cheery non-ending way. 

Ideas suddenly struck, and I slowly started typing. 

 

I awoke in the morning, the sun blazing overhead: this desert thing wasn't looking like such a great idea. 

I sat up, stretching my arms towards the sky, weakly flapping my wings to stretch the tendons that had tensed up during the night. 

I sat there, watching the clouds. 

 

And..and....

" Dammitt, he has to DO something!" I muttered, glaring at my screen: sitting there watching clouds could only do for so long before you had to have an actual plot. 

It was late, and i was out of ideas: I left him sitting like a dweeb watching clouds, logged off after saving the draft, and went to bed. 

 

I still sat there: the sun didn't move in the sky overhead, and I couldn't stop watching the shifting patterns of the clouds. Hour after hour...

I was scared by it: I couldn't move, I couldn't breathe. 

What was happening? 

 

 

 

 

 

( Yay for fourth wall breaking! )

Edited July 29, 201411 yr by Jack Frost