Hey guys, I'm gonna ask you guys for some help in the next few days cause I got myself into a real firetrucked situation.
Ok, so there's this Girl, name her G, which I love so much and we're best friends for over 2 years and we've been a couple for almost a year and half but about 2 weeks ago, after we both went to a new school together, what I feared most happened.
She's a beautiful, hot girl and everyone stares at her when she walks by but she's an angel of a girl! So sweet, innocent and fun that she's literally perfect!
Now the thing is, 2 years ago she had a hard time trusting people and she was very insecure. Then I came along and we started Skyping and talking every day till 3 am and we were such good friends and we were always there for one and other. about 6 months later I decided to ask her out and we started being a couple and I truly loved her that all I ever wanted to do was spend time with her and for the first 4 months of our relationship we didn't kiss, until I found out she was scared about it and I kinda forced her into it (NOT RAPE!) and ever since then she fell hard for me and we spent almost everyday together and we were so happy!
So about a year afterwards she decided she doesn't want us anymore, because of this kid who she claimed is just her friend but I knew he wanted more and I got jealous and a bad side of me came out.
So we stayed good friend but we kept being on/off in terms of relationship. We were together during this past summer until I stopped it to be with another girl cause I felt like I needed something new. 2 days later I realized what an idiot and a fool I am and begged her to get back together with me (She doesn't know the reason for the brake up, in other words she doesn't know I've been with someone else).
She was very hurt by the break up cause she really started to fall in love with me again, but we got back together. Until 2 weeks ago when she decided she wants something new and this guy asked her out a little before that and she's currently thinking about becoming this guys girlfriend.
And here's where I firetrucked it up, I love her and care for her so much that I felt a sharp pain in my heart when she told me she wants something new. I tried to convince her out of it, to give me a chance but worst of all I didn't stop calling and sending super emotional text messages and I admit I was crazy, and she told me to my face that I'm mentally ill. But the only reason I did it was cause of the pain, such a sharp pain the only thing that could relieve it was to hear her voice and when the pain got really bad I didn't notice how bad I can get. But I eventually did, a couple nights ago I realized I'm loosing my best friend and I lost it. I told her I'm sorry and I'll never do it again even though the pain consists, I'll keep it to myself. She said I'm more important to her than anyone else but not when I'm in this condition.
Last night I called her up at about 00:30 to ask her if we could meet today and she let a friend she was out with answer and not give the phone to her and I really got offended by it cause I was really just calling to ask that, not to be crazy me and I understand it's my fault and the blame is on me. Then a friend called me and said he heard from a close friend of the guy who asked her out that their together. And I just lost it. I had to get up for work at 7:00 and I knew I couldn't possibly work with so much pain but I had to cause this is a new job. I went home at 11 after declaring sick, cause I really wasn't in a working shape.
I called her house and her mom picked up and she probably heard from my voice that I was crying earlier (I felt I had completely lost her) And she woke her up for me (We're on vacation) and I started explaining everything, how bad of a day I had and I asked her if she's with the other guy and said no and I started crying on the phone to her, like I haven't cried since my grandfathers funeral. So later on I talked to her and she said she doesn't want to meet with me until she says I'm truly better and that I'm my normal self again, and although I feel I am, It's not up to me so for a few days I'll need to give her some space and call less and the pain in my heart will grow stronger so I need you guys to help me pull it together. Whether it'd be jokes, story's or just support, I need someone neutral to help me.
I know it's long but I had to dump it all somewhere. And please, don't tell me to move on. I love her so much I'll wait forever for her. And she said she still loves me but want's to try some new stuff but I'm always paranoid she might like that new stuff over me..
Hey guys, I'm gonna ask you guys for some help in the next few days cause I got myself into a real firetrucked situation.
Ok, so there's this Girl, name her G, which I love so much and we're best friends for over 2 years and we've been a couple for almost a year and half but about 2 weeks ago, after we both went to a new school together, what I feared most happened.
She's a beautiful, hot girl and everyone stares at her when she walks by but she's an angel of a girl! So sweet, innocent and fun that she's literally perfect!
Now the thing is, 2 years ago she had a hard time trusting people and she was very insecure. Then I came along and we started Skyping and talking every day till 3 am and we were such good friends and we were always there for one and other. about 6 months later I decided to ask her out and we started being a couple and I truly loved her that all I ever wanted to do was spend time with her and for the first 4 months of our relationship we didn't kiss, until I found out she was scared about it and I kinda forced her into it (NOT RAPE!) and ever since then she fell hard for me and we spent almost everyday together and we were so happy!
So about a year afterwards she decided she doesn't want us anymore, because of this kid who she claimed is just her friend but I knew he wanted more and I got jealous and a bad side of me came out.
So we stayed good friend but we kept being on/off in terms of relationship. We were together during this past summer until I stopped it to be with another girl cause I felt like I needed something new. 2 days later I realized what an idiot and a fool I am and begged her to get back together with me (She doesn't know the reason for the brake up, in other words she doesn't know I've been with someone else).
She was very hurt by the break up cause she really started to fall in love with me again, but we got back together. Until 2 weeks ago when she decided she wants something new and this guy asked her out a little before that and she's currently thinking about becoming this guys girlfriend.
And here's where I firetrucked it up, I love her and care for her so much that I felt a sharp pain in my heart when she told me she wants something new. I tried to convince her out of it, to give me a chance but worst of all I didn't stop calling and sending super emotional text messages and I admit I was crazy, and she told me to my face that I'm mentally ill. But the only reason I did it was cause of the pain, such a sharp pain the only thing that could relieve it was to hear her voice and when the pain got really bad I didn't notice how bad I can get. But I eventually did, a couple nights ago I realized I'm loosing my best friend and I lost it. I told her I'm sorry and I'll never do it again even though the pain consists, I'll keep it to myself. She said I'm more important to her than anyone else but not when I'm in this condition.
Last night I called her up at about 00:30 to ask her if we could meet today and she let a friend she was out with answer and not give the phone to her and I really got offended by it cause I was really just calling to ask that, not to be crazy me and I understand it's my fault and the blame is on me. Then a friend called me and said he heard from a close friend of the guy who asked her out that their together. And I just lost it. I had to get up for work at 7:00 and I knew I couldn't possibly work with so much pain but I had to cause this is a new job. I went home at 11 after declaring sick, cause I really wasn't in a working shape.
I called her house and her mom picked up and she probably heard from my voice that I was crying earlier (I felt I had completely lost her) And she woke her up for me (We're on vacation) and I started explaining everything, how bad of a day I had and I asked her if she's with the other guy and said no and I started crying on the phone to her, like I haven't cried since my grandfathers funeral. So later on I talked to her and she said she doesn't want to meet with me until she says I'm truly better and that I'm my normal self again, and although I feel I am, It's not up to me so for a few days I'll need to give her some space and call less and the pain in my heart will grow stronger so I need you guys to help me pull it together. Whether it'd be jokes, story's or just support, I need someone neutral to help me.
I know it's long but I had to dump it all somewhere. And please, don't tell me to move on. I love her so much I'll wait forever for her. And she said she still loves me but want's to try some new stuff but I'm always paranoid she might like that new stuff over me..
Sometimes I wish I was a heartless..
Thanks for reading!