Lord Sora is the current ruler of Kingdom Hearts. He somehow managed to get this title, even though he is only 14 years old. He is living the dream, and gets to play with his favourite cartoon characters from Disney. Beginnings Sora lived on Destiny Islands with Riku and Kairi until there was an oil leak offshore. It covered the island in darkness, seals were getting killed. To escape Riku jumped into the oil, Sora went through a “magical” door and Kairi being too stupid stayed on the Island. Sora battled figments of his imagination with his reject sidekicks, Goofy and Donald found at the local YMCA. They would participate in many things including: Fighting Casting “Magic” Healing Donald, over and over and over again Pwning Noobs Making really gay smiles towards the camera that follows them around Trying to find a hoe called Kairi Chess Tournaments Speaking in Tounges Cleaning up litter The New New Age (1989-2006) Sora in his effort to clean up the litter left by Disneyland Tourists, the Mickey Mouse League promoted Sora from cleaner to the Ruler of Kingdom Hearts. Timeline of Sora’s Reign1986:Destiny Islands were accepted into Kingdom 1993:The Great Heartless Raid 1994:Sora, Riku and Donald destroyed Ancient Rome 1999:Organization XIII is founded 2000:The Great War between Kingdom Hearts and Kingdom Brains 2003:Age of 13 Assasination Attempts 2005:The Nobody War 2006:The Invasion 2012:A Crappy Sequel The Kingdom of Hearts Kingdom Hearts is a not-so-vast kingdom right next to Kingdom Brains in the Japan Circle. The leader of the kingdom was and still is Lord Sora, an incredibly lousy disney nerd living his dream. Geography The locations of Kingdom Hearts are relatively close together in Japan. One part, however, is not. Castle Oblivion - The very same lame plastic castle you’ll find at disney land. No one likes it so people are all oblivious to it. Destiny Islands - A pair of small islands where people go to find a relationship Twilight Town - The capital city of Kingdom Hearts, it is located near Castle Oblivion and the time of day is always dusk, which doesn’t allow people to sleep very well. It is home to plenty of Bush supporters and has a secret base of the sworn enemies of Kingdom Farts-- no wait, i mean hearts. The giant cock tower located in the center of the city is the official government and political mind control device. The insomia of the people adds to Likeliness of being mind controlled. Traverse Town - A town located south of Twilight Town that is home to outcasts of every other location in the kingdom. Lots of hobos take shelter here. Hollow Bastion - A castle north of Castle Oblivion that serves as a small city to its citizens. It was created by a man who ripped his body in half and is now half dead. The World that Never Was - The World that Never Was never was a city with futuristic buildings and a small cove somewhere. Some never said it didn’t exist, and they weren’t right because it never was. It never was called Deep Dive City because a man never took a dive off of it in effort to never kill himself but never was successful, and because nobody knew what its true name ever was. The true name never was revealed when somebody realized that the city never was. It never was the home to the Mickey Mouse League’s centers for creation and distribution of software for computers and video games. End of the World - A location, not a date, unlike what it sounds like. Random parts of the Earth that were blown off of the planet collected together and created this. It is also home to the actual landmark called Kingdom Hearts, a door that connects our dimension with another one. Recently, End of the World has crashed into the ocean, while Kingdom Hearts drifted above the World that Never Was. Deep 13 - Castle Oblivion’s sub-basement. Close to Kingdom Hearts’s atomic pile. Germany - A country in central Europe. It is bordered to the north by the North Sea, Denmark, and the Baltic Sea, to the east by Poland and the Czech Republic, to the south by Austria and Switzerland HistoryThe Beginning (1397-1418) Kingdom Hearts was created in 1793 as an independent nation. It was ruled by King Mickey the Forgotten, an ancient and forgotten ancestor of Mickey Mouse the Great. The kingdom started out as just an oversized door called Kingdom Hearts, then Castle Oblivion was built in front of it. The door was supposedly magical and led to another dimension, but scientists thought otherwise. It was never proved whether or not it really did lead to another dimension as it was never opened. King Mickey the Forgotten died 8 years later, leaving Kingdom Hearts as an anarchy. For 12 years Kingdom Hearts was left in a state of panic, with no good leaders and a strange series of droughts that occured around the castle. In 1813, a crazy man with lots of powerful dynamite blew the door off of the face of the Earth along with himself, causing everyone to go into a state of even more extreme panic. Finally, one year later, a strong leader known to this day as Darkwing Duck led the kingdom to a new age. The New Age (1418-1958) Known as the Golden Age by some. Darkwing Duck, arguably the second best leader that Kingdom Hearts ever had, brought forth a time of goodness in the kingdom. He and a group of construction workers created Twilight Town and Hollow Bastion, two landmarks that are famous to this very day. Darkwing Duck was assassinated in 1851 by a warfaring man, Gooferneur Gimmler,he was a sadistic man dog who became the dictator of Kingdom Hearts. Goofernuer brought a new age to Kingdom Hearts, an age that wasn’t very good for the kingdom at all. The Invasion of Disney (1958-1989) Gooferneur Gimmler started war with a small town now known as the World that Never Was for fun, and the city became part of the small kingdom. A few years later in 1857, Gooferneur declared war on Disneyland, which ended one week later after Disneyland easily defeated Kingdom Hearts and made it into part of their empire. Under the control of Disneyland, Gooferneur was executed and Kingdom Hearts was temporarily put under control of the current ruler of Disneyland. During this time, Traverse Town was created by outcasts from Twilight Town. The End of the World started to form around the Kingdom Hearts door, all of which were orbiting the Earth. However, instead of being temporary, the kingdom remained under the rule of whoever Disneyland’s present leader was until 1989, when Lord Sora, General Riku and Vicereine Kairi came to Kingdom Hearts from the Destiny Islands. The New New Age (1989-2006) Lord Sora and his friends, Riku and Kairi, showed great leadership in Kingdom Hearts, so the Mickey Mouse League made Sora the ruler of Kingdom Hearts, Riku the head of its defense and Kairi the leader when Sora was busy. The Destiny Islands were also accepted into Kingdom Hearts. In 1993, war erupted between strange creatures known as the Heartless and the people of Kingdom Hearts known as the Great Heartless Raid. Lord Sora, General Riku and Admiral Donald Duck helped in defeating the great menace all around the world and around time, including in ancient Rome. Soon after this, members of the XIII Order invaded Castle Oblivion and Lord Sora had to clear them out and stop them from taking over his castle. A year later, the new enemies of Kingdom Hearts, the XIII Order, attacked Kingdom Hearts and other places across time. This fued is known as the Nobody War. General Riku became a double agent for the Order and Kingdom Hearts during this war, which helped win the war. After these two wars ended, Kingdom Hearts was back in a period of peace. The Invasion (2006-2006) Shortly after the period of peace arrived, Flash Gordon, with no reason in mind, invaded. It was a fierce battle between the quarterback and a militia of assorted personified farm animals, and many were lost on Kingdom Hearts’s side. All was not lost however, soon Sora and Riku ran to meet Flash Gordon in battle. Riku ran in first, but was promptly hit in the face with a football. His fangirls, who usually worshipped him for his hotness, noticed the large lump and tore him up for becoming ugly. Sora, seeing this, knew that he would have to devise a plan to defeat this powerful foe, but before he could finish thinking that he needed a plan, Flash grabbed him by the neck and stuck a laser at Fayt Leingod, who was on the battlefield for no apparent reason. Was all lost? Only time will tell. One things is certain though: getting hit in the face with a football hurts. The Reconstruction (2006-???X) While in a battle in the Invasion, Flash Gordon’s hip was broken by Riku, who had cut off his lump from his face and made it into a keyblade. Fayt Leingold then said “Hip, hip, hooray” at response to his broken hip. The people from the TV show Whose Line Is It Anyways heard of this and sued Leingod for copyright infringements. Leingod was sentenced to the second longest prison sentence ever: 3,182 years in prison. Gordon was given a sentence of disallowing him to have sex ever again, which caused him to commit suicide. Admiral Donald Duck then used his magic to turn everything in Kingdom Hearts back to normal.* It should be noted that none of this actually happened, but that all the Disney characters were put in a coma and just imagined it. Anywho, after this point, Kingdom Hearts only existed in the minds of the now lifeless vegetables that had lived there. Any history after this should be disregarded. Seriously, look at the gaping logic in it. Note that Riku had already been defeated so how could he break Flash’s hip? Also, how in the world would they lock Flash Gordon in prison? He’d just break out. Not that this article made any sense before, but... Politics Kingdom Hearts, being a monarchy, has always had the sole leader make decisions, because either the leader was trusted or because the citizens had no choice. Currently, Lord Sora, General Riku and Vicereine Kairi make all decisions for the kingdom because they are trusted more than anyone else in the kingdom. Lord Sora resides in Castle Oblivion, making decisions about the nation and planning to make it better while General Riku and Vicereine Kairi do the same in the Twilight Town clock tower. Economy Most of the money made for the government of Kingdom Hearts is from its successful video game and computer software sales, which are both funded by money from the Mickey Mouse League and the Sony Republic. The rest of the money was spent on cocaine and booze, as well as pornography. The creation and produciton buildings of the software receive some tourism by people interested in the video games that they make, so they have a store for them in the World that Never Was, the location of all video game and computer software creation factories. The video games that they sell are based on historical figures of the Mickey Mouse League’s nations, such as Sora and Mickey Mouse the Great. The suicide effort at Deep Dive City’s video game and software production facility was kept discreet to avoid scaring tourists away. Currency The official currency of Kingdom Hearts is the Castle Oblivion Battle Card which comes in bills of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 and 0. The $0 bill, however, is unique in that when you are giving change it is the most valuable bill but when you are buying products it is the least valuable bill. Thus, travelers in Kingdom Hearts trying to convert foriegn currencies to Castle Oblivion Battle Cards are likely to experience a phenomenon known as a “card break” in which their funds become completely worthless. Avoid “card breaks” at any cost, unless you are breaking somebody else. Culture Everyone in Kingdom Hearts is bilingual, speaking both Japanese and English fluently, though some places speak Japanese more than English or vice versa. For example, people in Hollow Bastion generally speak Japanese, while people in Traverse Town are known to prefer English over Japanese. The appearance of people also changes between towns in the kingdom. People outside of Traverse Town usually look Japanese, while most of the people in Traverse Town appear to be American or European. Swordfighting is a common tradition in most parts of Kingdom Hearts.
Lord Sora is the current ruler of Kingdom Hearts. He somehow managed to get this title, even though he is only 14 years old. He is living the dream, and gets to play with his favourite cartoon characters from Disney. Beginnings Sora lived on Destiny Islands with Riku and Kairi until there was an oil leak offshore. It covered the island in darkness, seals were getting killed. To escape Riku jumped into the oil, Sora went through a “magical” door and Kairi being too stupid stayed on the Island. Sora battled figments of his imagination with his reject sidekicks, Goofy and Donald found at the local YMCA. They would participate in many things including: Fighting Casting “Magic” Healing Donald, over and over and over again Pwning Noobs Making really gay smiles towards the camera that follows them around Trying to find a hoe called Kairi Chess Tournaments Speaking in Tounges Cleaning up litter The New New Age (1989-2006) Sora in his effort to clean up the litter left by Disneyland Tourists, the Mickey Mouse League promoted Sora from cleaner to the Ruler of Kingdom Hearts. Timeline of Sora’s Reign 1986:Destiny Islands were accepted into Kingdom 1993:The Great Heartless Raid 1994:Sora, Riku and Donald destroyed Ancient Rome 1999:Organization XIII is founded 2000:The Great War between Kingdom Hearts and Kingdom Brains 2003:Age of 13 Assasination Attempts 2005:The Nobody War 2006:The Invasion 2012:A Crappy Sequel The Kingdom of Hearts Kingdom Hearts is a not-so-vast kingdom right next to Kingdom Brains in the Japan Circle. The leader of the kingdom was and still is Lord Sora, an incredibly lousy disney nerd living his dream. Geography The locations of Kingdom Hearts are relatively close together in Japan. One part, however, is not. Castle Oblivion - The very same lame plastic castle you’ll find at disney land. No one likes it so people are all oblivious to it. Destiny Islands - A pair of small islands where people go to find a relationship Twilight Town - The capital city of Kingdom Hearts, it is located near Castle Oblivion and the time of day is always dusk, which doesn’t allow people to sleep very well. It is home to plenty of Bush supporters and has a secret base of the sworn enemies of Kingdom Farts-- no wait, i mean hearts. The giant cock tower located in the center of the city is the official government and political mind control device. The insomia of the people adds to Likeliness of being mind controlled. Traverse Town - A town located south of Twilight Town that is home to outcasts of every other location in the kingdom. Lots of hobos take shelter here. Hollow Bastion - A castle north of Castle Oblivion that serves as a small city to its citizens. It was created by a man who ripped his body in half and is now half dead. The World that Never Was - The World that Never Was never was a city with futuristic buildings and a small cove somewhere. Some never said it didn’t exist, and they weren’t right because it never was. It never was called Deep Dive City because a man never took a dive off of it in effort to never kill himself but never was successful, and because nobody knew what its true name ever was. The true name never was revealed when somebody realized that the city never was. It never was the home to the Mickey Mouse League’s centers for creation and distribution of software for computers and video games. End of the World - A location, not a date, unlike what it sounds like. Random parts of the Earth that were blown off of the planet collected together and created this. It is also home to the actual landmark called Kingdom Hearts, a door that connects our dimension with another one. Recently, End of the World has crashed into the ocean, while Kingdom Hearts drifted above the World that Never Was. Deep 13 - Castle Oblivion’s sub-basement. Close to Kingdom Hearts’s atomic pile. Germany - A country in central Europe. It is bordered to the north by the North Sea, Denmark, and the Baltic Sea, to the east by Poland and the Czech Republic, to the south by Austria and Switzerland History The Beginning (1397-1418) Kingdom Hearts was created in 1793 as an independent nation. It was ruled by King Mickey the Forgotten, an ancient and forgotten ancestor of Mickey Mouse the Great. The kingdom started out as just an oversized door called Kingdom Hearts, then Castle Oblivion was built in front of it. The door was supposedly magical and led to another dimension, but scientists thought otherwise. It was never proved whether or not it really did lead to another dimension as it was never opened. King Mickey the Forgotten died 8 years later, leaving Kingdom Hearts as an anarchy. For 12 years Kingdom Hearts was left in a state of panic, with no good leaders and a strange series of droughts that occured around the castle. In 1813, a crazy man with lots of powerful dynamite blew the door off of the face of the Earth along with himself, causing everyone to go into a state of even more extreme panic. Finally, one year later, a strong leader known to this day as Darkwing Duck led the kingdom to a new age. The New Age (1418-1958) Known as the Golden Age by some. Darkwing Duck, arguably the second best leader that Kingdom Hearts ever had, brought forth a time of goodness in the kingdom. He and a group of construction workers created Twilight Town and Hollow Bastion, two landmarks that are famous to this very day. Darkwing Duck was assassinated in 1851 by a warfaring man, Gooferneur Gimmler,he was a sadistic man dog who became the dictator of Kingdom Hearts. Goofernuer brought a new age to Kingdom Hearts, an age that wasn’t very good for the kingdom at all. The Invasion of Disney (1958-1989) Gooferneur Gimmler started war with a small town now known as the World that Never Was for fun, and the city became part of the small kingdom. A few years later in 1857, Gooferneur declared war on Disneyland, which ended one week later after Disneyland easily defeated Kingdom Hearts and made it into part of their empire. Under the control of Disneyland, Gooferneur was executed and Kingdom Hearts was temporarily put under control of the current ruler of Disneyland. During this time, Traverse Town was created by outcasts from Twilight Town. The End of the World started to form around the Kingdom Hearts door, all of which were orbiting the Earth. However, instead of being temporary, the kingdom remained under the rule of whoever Disneyland’s present leader was until 1989, when Lord Sora, General Riku and Vicereine Kairi came to Kingdom Hearts from the Destiny Islands. The New New Age (1989-2006) Lord Sora and his friends, Riku and Kairi, showed great leadership in Kingdom Hearts, so the Mickey Mouse League made Sora the ruler of Kingdom Hearts, Riku the head of its defense and Kairi the leader when Sora was busy. The Destiny Islands were also accepted into Kingdom Hearts. In 1993, war erupted between strange creatures known as the Heartless and the people of Kingdom Hearts known as the Great Heartless Raid. Lord Sora, General Riku and Admiral Donald Duck helped in defeating the great menace all around the world and around time, including in ancient Rome. Soon after this, members of the XIII Order invaded Castle Oblivion and Lord Sora had to clear them out and stop them from taking over his castle. A year later, the new enemies of Kingdom Hearts, the XIII Order, attacked Kingdom Hearts and other places across time. This fued is known as the Nobody War. General Riku became a double agent for the Order and Kingdom Hearts during this war, which helped win the war. After these two wars ended, Kingdom Hearts was back in a period of peace. The Invasion (2006-2006) Shortly after the period of peace arrived, Flash Gordon, with no reason in mind, invaded. It was a fierce battle between the quarterback and a militia of assorted personified farm animals, and many were lost on Kingdom Hearts’s side. All was not lost however, soon Sora and Riku ran to meet Flash Gordon in battle. Riku ran in first, but was promptly hit in the face with a football. His fangirls, who usually worshipped him for his hotness, noticed the large lump and tore him up for becoming ugly. Sora, seeing this, knew that he would have to devise a plan to defeat this powerful foe, but before he could finish thinking that he needed a plan, Flash grabbed him by the neck and stuck a laser at Fayt Leingod, who was on the battlefield for no apparent reason. Was all lost? Only time will tell. One things is certain though: getting hit in the face with a football hurts. The Reconstruction (2006-???X) While in a battle in the Invasion, Flash Gordon’s hip was broken by Riku, who had cut off his lump from his face and made it into a keyblade. Fayt Leingold then said “Hip, hip, hooray” at response to his broken hip. The people from the TV show Whose Line Is It Anyways heard of this and sued Leingod for copyright infringements. Leingod was sentenced to the second longest prison sentence ever: 3,182 years in prison. Gordon was given a sentence of disallowing him to have sex ever again, which caused him to commit suicide. Admiral Donald Duck then used his magic to turn everything in Kingdom Hearts back to normal.* It should be noted that none of this actually happened, but that all the Disney characters were put in a coma and just imagined it. Anywho, after this point, Kingdom Hearts only existed in the minds of the now lifeless vegetables that had lived there. Any history after this should be disregarded. Seriously, look at the gaping logic in it. Note that Riku had already been defeated so how could he break Flash’s hip? Also, how in the world would they lock Flash Gordon in prison? He’d just break out. Not that this article made any sense before, but... Politics Kingdom Hearts, being a monarchy, has always had the sole leader make decisions, because either the leader was trusted or because the citizens had no choice. Currently, Lord Sora, General Riku and Vicereine Kairi make all decisions for the kingdom because they are trusted more than anyone else in the kingdom. Lord Sora resides in Castle Oblivion, making decisions about the nation and planning to make it better while General Riku and Vicereine Kairi do the same in the Twilight Town clock tower. Economy Most of the money made for the government of Kingdom Hearts is from its successful video game and computer software sales, which are both funded by money from the Mickey Mouse League and the Sony Republic. The rest of the money was spent on cocaine and booze, as well as pornography. The creation and produciton buildings of the software receive some tourism by people interested in the video games that they make, so they have a store for them in the World that Never Was, the location of all video game and computer software creation factories. The video games that they sell are based on historical figures of the Mickey Mouse League’s nations, such as Sora and Mickey Mouse the Great. The suicide effort at Deep Dive City’s video game and software production facility was kept discreet to avoid scaring tourists away. Currency The official currency of Kingdom Hearts is the Castle Oblivion Battle Card which comes in bills of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 and 0. The $0 bill, however, is unique in that when you are giving change it is the most valuable bill but when you are buying products it is the least valuable bill. Thus, travelers in Kingdom Hearts trying to convert foriegn currencies to Castle Oblivion Battle Cards are likely to experience a phenomenon known as a “card break” in which their funds become completely worthless. Avoid “card breaks” at any cost, unless you are breaking somebody else. Culture Everyone in Kingdom Hearts is bilingual, speaking both Japanese and English fluently, though some places speak Japanese more than English or vice versa. For example, people in Hollow Bastion generally speak Japanese, while people in Traverse Town are known to prefer English over Japanese. The appearance of people also changes between towns in the kingdom. People outside of Traverse Town usually look Japanese, while most of the people in Traverse Town appear to be American or European. Swordfighting is a common tradition in most parts of Kingdom Hearts.
source: lounge.moviecodec.com
Edited by Villi1997