_EPISODE 1_

 

Setting: A huge Kingdom Hearts logo with a keyblade spinning around in the middle. An intro with the title shows up on the screen...transitioning to a backdrop of the same logo, with Sora, standing in place.

 

Sora: Holy smokes, baloney, fudge and mustard, stop the presses and stop the internet!! If you are a member of KH13, and are loading this up your internet machine....you're here. Now, stand, the F**K UP!!

 

(No one stands up. Not even the cast members off screen watching)

 

Sora: -__-....Well, anyways....welcome to 5 Questions With The Kingdom Hearts Cast....where the most important questions on the face of this planet are answered....these, my friends (holds up paper) are the questions. And we (spreads arms out) We...have the answers....the answers to existance! (raises fist)

 

Riku: (Off-stage): By God, you're a ham.

 

Sora: (looks to Riku): By God, you're a homo.

 

(off-screen cast "OOOOHHHH"s in unison.)

 

Riku: -__-....just start the f*king show.

 

Sora: Alrighty then! First question....

 

(record skip, pause)

 

Hi, Firaga96. You know, I was going to make up stuff at this point, but then i thought, "Hey, why not get some actual questions going?"

 

So, KH13.com, I'm leaving the rest to you. Post some questions, being about anything you want to ask Sora, and once I get five, I'll continue the story from there. If you didn't get your question in, you can always ask another one for another character.

Edited October 14, 201213 yr by Firaga96

*Comments back at Lea about the answer to Xamtweth's question*

Yes, I beated DDD, i just want to see your opinion.

To Namine: Namine have you ever heard of Samus Aran and the Metroid Prime series?

Edited October 4, 201213 yr by Tom13

__EPISODE 6___

 

Namine: Hey, what's up everybody from Milwaukee to the Muhabi! If you have an internet connection.....then welcome back to 5 Questions With The Kingdom Hearts Cast. Why are you here? Because this is simply....the most important piece of information....on the entire....internet. (raises eybrows) Your questions.....our answers.....Somewhere along the way, we all became these all knowing entities and have been delegated to answer your questions.....and as it turns out, you guys are half buying it.....I thank you for that. Let's get started, my babies, question one! From xoblivion13x....."Namine, could you try some assertiveness exercises? I mean, you define yourself as a shade of Kairi, with the only purpose to existence being helping Sora." (pouts) ..... I'm kidding. Heh. . Quite frankly, Oblivion, I'm fine with my place in the series....not every character needs a Keyblade, y'know. If anyone f**ks with me, I got my memory powers.....just give me a minute on their sorry asses and WHAM! (hits fist into opposite palm) done. One messed-with memory (raises index finger) and you'll be thinking that you live in a pineapple under the sea.....yeah....I just went there. Problem?

 

Larxene: I have a problem.

 

Namine: You always have a problem. -__- (under breath) Cunt.,,

 

Larxene: What was that?!

 

Namine: Nothing! (shows fake cheeky smile) Question two! (clears throat) Gambler'sApprentice wants to know: "Namine, could you try and be more of your own person, I mean, seriously you consider yourself Kairi's reflection to the point you're paired with Roxas, the character that shares the most with Sora without being Sora, who you also tried to hook up with, by picking apart his memory in order to do so." Ah, more bashing for me, huh....(sighs) let me break something to you.....I don't have control of my character. I really don't. That guy (points off screen to Normura) ? He's the writer. I'm an actor. I just follow the script. Although, in my personal opnion, I would like to develop a little in myself, just a little. Normura?

 

Normura: We shall see....

 

Namine: Welp, there you go. I guess the future will give us an answer....(looks to paper) (hums a little) Question number three.....already on three. See, this is what happens when a sane character gets camera time.

 

(All previous hosts are like http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/ohmy.png and others are like :angry: )

 

Namine: Ha-Ha ....anyways, the question, by Oblivion, again, says "To Namine: We know most of the things you sketch come true....but what other things do you draw in that notepad besides Sora, Roxas, Axel, and a few other people Sora's friends with?" .... uh...that's sorta of private...

 

Roxas: She draws me in the nude!

 

Namine: Roxas! (blushes) (looks to camera and nervously laughs) He's just foolin'....I actually draw much different things.....sometimes things from nature like flowers or animals or...

 

Sora: Me and Riku makin' out!

 

Namine: Sora, shut it! (blushes even redder) .... Look, my sketches are very private. I don't show them to a lot of people because--

 

Riku: Hey Namine, I just posted some of your drawings on my Twitter.

 

Namine: The f**k, Riku?! (face turns into a tomato) (now angry) ..... you realize that you're memories are gonna be jacked now, right?

 

Riku: You don't have the balls to--

 

Namine: (snaps finger)

 

Riku: AH! MY MIND! (falls to the ground, twitching)

 

Namine: Ha-ha . Teach you to f**k with my shit.....Sora? Roxas?

 

Sora and Roxas: 0-0......Sorry.

 

Namine: I thought so....now, for the next question....Tom13 says, "To Namine: Namine have you ever heard of Samus Aran and the Metroid Prime series?" Um, yes I have...... I love Metroid! Samus Aran is my favorite video game character of all time!

 

Kairi: Other than yourself?

 

Namine: Uh, no, that's you.

 

Kairi: .... well, you're not wrong.

 

Namine: Ladies and gentleman, Kairi...(shakes head and laughs) anyways, she is a total badass. It so glad to see a female who's independent, modest, and smart. That's why...(sighs) Other M.....(facepalms) Come on, Sakamoto....you coulda done better....-___-.....hopefully if there is a new Metroid game, probably for the Wii U or 3DS or something, it'll be able to wipe the filth off Samus's rep.....Sammy, I'm pullin' for ya, babe....we blondes gotta stick together. Moving on...next question...

 

(pause)

 

X*X*X*X*X

 

One more aughta do it folks.....

 

AND here's a question from me to you......would it be cool if I made a Naruto version of this series? (I will try to not repeat the same jokes. lol. No promises, though...)

Edited October 7, 201213 yr by Firaga96

Umm is this over~?

 

If it isn't then I have only one question, out of curiosity, I MAY BE WRONG:

 

To the whole of Organization XIII: If Roxas and Xion were the only members who could collect hearts... until they were 'created' what did you guys ever do? Uhh, any other important stuff like eating cake and sitting on huge freaking chairs?

Umm is this over~?

Not by a long shot. I'm just waiting on someone to ask a Namine question so I can wrap up Episode 6 and move on to the next one.

Edited April 4, 201312 yr by Firaga96

Hmmmm Namine....what would you do for a Klondike Bar?

 

(unpause)

 

Namine: Moving on.....question five.....last one, babies....from Oblivion, again. "Hmmmm Namine....what would you do for a Klondike Bar? " .... Oh, I would do many things for a Klondike Bar. Just name it and I'll do it. Hell, I would try to take over this damn series if it meant getting a Klondike Bar. Picture it: I beat the shit out of Sora...

 

Sora:

 

Namine: I'd bitchslap Roxas....

 

Roxas: :(

 

Namine: I'd torture Riku...

 

Riku: (too bust staring into a mirror to notice)

 

Namine: Anything at all. Frick, I'd even take on Xehanort.

 

Xehanort: You sure about that?

 

Namine: Dude, it's a Klondike Bar.

 

Xehanort: Hmm.....fair enough.

 

Namine: That's right....anything for that choclate masterpiece......any one of you watching would do worse, don't lie! You might have even said you'd deep fry Donald and Goofy...

 

Goofy: (gulps)

 

Donald: Wak?! You massicist!

 

Namine: Techinacally, it's just the circle of life.

 

Simba: Huh?

 

Namine: Different thing.

 

Simba: Ah. Right.

 

Namine: Yeah....by the way, has anyone gone up to you lately and said they thought you sounded like Minato Namikaze?

 

Simba: Nope. I can't see the similarity.

 

Namine: Me either.

 

I do.

 

Namine: Anyways, Oblvion....I hope you enjoyed that. That came from the heart. It truly did.....(looks backstage) No! Don't you curse me! You would have done worse too! I know you, man! .... Besides, who's to stop me if I were to? Is it Aladdin? I don't frickin think so! (gets closer to camera, shakes arm) Go ahead, twist my arm, get me to stop. Will ya do it? NO! You didn't! (backs away, points at camera) You sat there and watched.....like the bitch you are.....(holds up middle finger, censored by a big Aladdin face) That's for you, honey. So in closing, KH fans, for episode 6, I leave you with this message....if anyone....has the gall to see Riku's Twitter....and take a peek at my sketches......well, there's not much I can do for you except tell you.....that yes, I am into that stuff. Are you gonna get your memory f**ked up if you decide to spread the word? Yes. For you see.....(background darkens) ....I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you're looking for money, I don't have any to give you. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired simply over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you keep the images to yourself, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, and you decided to share them with your other dickweed friends..... I will look for you.......I will find you.......and I will kill you. (narrows eyes)

 

Larxene: Way to be original.

 

(record scratch, lighting returns to normal)

 

Namine: :wacko: Ah! -__- Way to ruin the moment! :angry: ......(sighs) Are we done? We are? Good. Have a nice day. (walks off)

 

X*X*X*X*X

 

Next up....uh.....I'll leave that to you.

Next up: Xion.

what about my question? awww :<

Demyx!! or Marluxia O__________________o

How about Ventus or Master Xehanort?

Master Xehanort?

 

http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/ohmy.png

Yes! I'm voting for this.

what about my question? awww :<

 

Don't fret. Eventually, ALL the questions already asked will get an answer.

Don't fret. Eventually, ALL the questions already asked will get an answer.

 

YEY~! YOU'RE THE BEST~!

I've decided that the star of Episode 7 will be..........Xion.

 

5 questions, please.

 

(Also, if you're interested in a Naruto version of this series, then let me know)

Edited October 21, 201213 yr by Firaga96

Hmmmm Namine....what would you do for a Klondike Bar?

 

 

That's from KHCF.

 

You are full of win by refering that.

Uh.....did I let this die out?

 

I apologize.

Xion,

Um...

...

...

What is your greatest achievement in life?

Xion,

Um...

...

...

What is your greatest achievement in life?

 

HA! I see what you did there....if you were trying to do anything.....you weren't, huh? Derp. lol.

Edited October 21, 201213 yr by Firaga96

To Xion: What was your reaction to Roxas's last words as a goodbye...."Who else will I have ice cream with?"

_EPISODE 7_

 

Xion: (holding the question papers and a latte in the same hand) ... Back again, for the first time, for the last time, changing your life and mine....five questions at a time--now I know what you're saying to yourself...you're sitting at home, on your computer....at a Subway on your laptop....or in a heavily-padded room with some sort of live video feed....fondling the areas of your body that need to be fondled.....and you're sayin', "Why does she have a cup of coffee in her hand?" ... (raises cup) Cuz this is the only thing keeping me standing right now, I gotta say thank you...to Andy, the owner of the Kowloon Restaurant in Saugas, Massachusetts. If you are ever in the mood for a good drink, emphasis on the drink...good food, and a good time, hit up the Kowloon Restaurant in Saugas, Massachussetts. I endorse it, the rest of the Kingdom Hearts cast endorses it...

 

(Cast murmurs in agreement)

 

Xion: That is all you need to know....long story short: I just about switched from sambuca to coffee...cuz I've been (singing) up all night! Sleep all day...(stops singing) except for the "sleep all day" part. Cuz I need to stay awake all day....and kick some Heartless ass at night.

 

(Cast members giggle a little)

 

Xion: (holds up coffee by face as camera zooms in) Okay, let's kick off the show.....question number one....(looks backstage) Yes, I am an idiot. And you are a certified, f**king whack-job....it is, it is, it will be....so big plug for you (looks back to papers, and lowers coffee) ... this is from Gambler'sApprentice....he asks, "What is your greatest achievement in life?" ... I think that's obvious, isn't it? Look around, silly. I'm in Kingdom Hearts! I mean, I'm not the best character overall...and I pretty much last one game, and have some significance in cutscenes in later ones....but, hey, the pay is great, it's fun, and the cast is like my family. I love it here, I truly do...you'd probably never expect an emo girl to make it this far...yes, I used to be emo. I just got over it, and I couldn't help but keep the hairstyle....because I like it.

 

Larxene: Shoulda thought twice about that, honey.

 

Xion: Coming from the chick with antennae...

 

(Cast "oohs", Larxene - :angry: )

 

Xion: Ha, really, are you a Kingdom Hearts character or a Bug's Life extra?

 

Larxene: Grr! (storms out)

 

Xion: Well, if you can't take the heat....you know the rest. Anyways, let's see the second question here....(looks to paper) Alright, question number two: from xoblivion13x. The question is, "What was your reaction to Roxas's last words as a goodbye....'Who else will I have ice cream with?'" ... Well, I couldn't really react, technically, since I was dead....but I can imagine myself, if I was alive to react....to just think...heh-heh (looks backstage)

 

Roxas: Oh no...(laughs)

 

Xion: My reaction would be "You son of a bitch!"

 

Roxas: (laughs)

 

Xion: I mean, come on, dude, what kind of line is that? I know you thought that up by yourself, you stupid.......I just don't understand.

 

Roxas: Hey, not my fault, Xi. It's just the principle.

 

Leal: Yeah, if it was me, i woulda got it.

 

Xion: Oh, you say that now....but if you were really in the position, you'd think the same thing I'm thinkin'!

 

Lea: Well, I didn't. Got it memorized?! http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/happy.png

 

Xion: 0-0...did you just...(weak laugh)....okay, okay, man, you're pushin' it! Do you want me to bring out your dirty laundry, cuz I will, but not...right now. (narrows eyes) I'm watching you....(laughs) That Lea. Never a dull moment...anyways, let's move on. Third question....

 

(pause)

 

X*X*X*X*X

 

Okay, three more to wrap up the episode. Send, send, send!

Edited October 21, 201213 yr by Firaga96

To Xion: Why didn't you kick Saix's butt when he was mean to you? You and Roxas could've teamed teamed up on him and thrown his sorry rear out the window with your Keyblade powers.

Uh, hello out there? This is a test to see if anyone thought this died again. It didn't. I'm about ready to scrap the idea, however.....

Whew! What a relief....thought an angry Organization member got you

 

Gasp! http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/ohmy.png Scarp? Scrap?? Nuuuuuuuu!! >n<

 

P.S.......did I seriously type the word scarp? The heck is that? *facepalm*

Whew! What a relief....thought an angry Organization member got you

 

Gasp! http://kh13.com/forum/public/style_emoticons/default/ohmy.png Scarp? Scrap?? Nuuuuuuuu!! >n<

 

P.S.......did I seriously type the word scarp? The heck is that? *facepalm*

 

No, I'm fine. I just don't pay attention sometimes when some of my threads, where I calmly ask that people leave feedback.....and get nothing. Kinda pisses me off, actually.