You all know about how genies are notorious for twisting wishes. So now it’s your turn to become a genie! But not like Jafar and be forced inside a dingy magic lamp…

 

Okay here’s how it goes! Your job is to ruin the wish of the person above you, and then make a wish of your own.

 

e.g., using a made up forum member, HugsandMuffins

 

HugsandMuffins:

I wish I were a professional pastry chef…

 

OblivionRider:

Granted, but you taste everything you cook and develop cholesterol problems.

I wish I didn’t need glasses.

 

HugsandMuffins:

Granted, but now you’re blind!

I wish…

 

See how it goes? Alrighty, to kick things off…

 

I wish I was a Keyblade Weilder…

Granted though you get lost after you saw the beaches and went for a swim

I wish to have everything!

Granted, but part of everything is a bloody knife in your back.

 

I wish that Mog killed Noel with poisoned flan.

Granted. After that Mog killed you with a poisoned fish.

 

I wish to have my own theme song.

Granted. You now must pay iTunes for purchasing it.

 

I wish I was General of the Blue Flare clan.

Granted. You got killed during a mission.

 

I wish to hear some more mumbo-jumbo.

Granted, but the mumbo-jumbo is AVADA KEDAVRA!

 

I wish that Hope was playable in FF XIII-2.

Granted. You have to pay extra for the extra character.

 

I wish that I had nothing.

Granted. You're at McDonald's.

 

I wish to have some meat.

Granted. You're at McDonald's.

 

I wish to have some meat.

Granted. You have to pay extra for the extra character.

 

I wish that I had nothing.

 

So, it's HOPE FREAKIN ESTHEIM!

 

Granted, but it's the slang meaning of meat.

 

I wish that Sora's Little Helper would never post again on this thread.

Granted, but you die so after he starts to post again.

I wish to be in love.

Granted. You fall in love with someone ugly.

 

I wish to have my own videoclip.

Granted, but it's of you breaking your neck.

 

I wish I was a young warthog.

Granted your a your wort on a hog.

I wish that ulgy wasn't real.

Granted, now it's spelled UGLY.

I wish that Xemnas was a girl

Granted Mansex Xemnas has now slaughter you for the wish

I wish I could rule the world!

Granted. The rest of the world got tired of you and made a revolution against you.

 

I wish for FUS RO DAH!

Granted I instead give you a fish

I wish that some ants could destroy you!

Granted. But they destroy you too.

 

 

I wish it wasn't so damned cold right now.

Granted. It's scorching hot now.

 

I wish to bring back Withney Houston.

Granted, but she's a zombie.

 

I wish Whitney Houston was the name of the 3rd gym leader in Johto.

Granted. She now has a Wigglytuff instead of a Miltank. With Hyper Voice.

 

I wish for this day to be normal.

Granted, now you're Whitney, the Normal-Type Gym leader.

 

I wish I had a baseball team of Slowbros!

Granted but they all get bated to death.

I wish I wasn't sick.

Granted but they all get bated to death.

I wish I wasn't sick.

 

Granted, but now you're dead (death was by suffocation by Slowbros).

 

I wish that Edward Cullen was dead.