With the current American Presidential elections, most people are, of course, focusing primarily on the Democratic ad Repupblican nominations of Obama and Romney. However, most people seem to forget that there are several independent parties on the ticket, and that it is your duty as voters (or, given that a number of you are under 18, interested by-standers) to educate yourself and find the best possible candidate. One that speaks for YOUR needs. One who will REALLY bring change. The leader who will take America's frown and turn it upside down.
Yes, throwing his hat into the Presidential race is none other than Kefka, representing the Cult of Kefka Party. While the Cult of Kefka Party was shamefully not invited to the debates (something about attempting threatening to sacrifice the press box being "morally wrong"), we feel it is important that you know what having Kefka in the White House means for your family.
Kekfa has said since the begining of the race that he will not make a single campaign promise he doesn't intend to keep. Such honesty and upfront politics are surely a boon. For instance, Kefka swears that all people, from all classes and backgrounds, will be treated perfectly equal. There will be no singling out or special treatment, and that the fate of one working class person is the fate of ALL people across the country. With the equality action plan he has written up (refered to as "The Ray of Judgement Stimulation Package), all people will be in the same economic boat within one year.
And let it not be said that Kefka is not concerned for the infrastructure! There will be several new job opportunities available, as he plans to see to the contstruction of many Monuments to Non-Existence, which will take the time and effort of the nation. It's hard work, but Kefka's not one to shirk from duty, and these Monuments will definately give many Americans unemployment problems virtually nihl.
Those in favor of the military certainly have nothing to fear! Kefka has made it clear that he intends to pour tons of gil into all armed forces. And don't worry about all that money going to waste: He then promises to invade every country in the world, making use of those tax dollars. Worried about resurgances in conquered nations? Fear not! Kefka promises to thoroughly crush civilization as we know it, so we don't have to worry about lengthy occupation times. But wait, you say: What happens to all those jobs in the military AFTER ending the world? Kefka promises that every member of the military will always be guaranteed a job working on the Monuments to Non-Existence, and given that he plans to fund a lot of these, there will be no shortage of work. So you see, there will ALWAYS be jobs and security for the armed forces!
Technology and science will not be neglected. Kefka forsees that, if elected, he will have great need for more industrial development and scientific research. In fact, he promises to expand the number of grants to universities willing to partake in the investigation of "Espers." Not only will this stimulate industrial growth, but it pays dividends for the education system!
But don't get the idea that Kefka is all work and no play. He enjoys a good laugh, just like you and me. Nor is he deaf to the pleas of the common man: he gladly enjoys listening to the voices of the millions crying out in unison. He's not afraid to be the clown from time to time, always the life at dance parties. If that doesn't make him accessible and relatable, I don't know what does.
So remember when you go to that ballot box: a vote for Kefka is a vote for the destruction of false promises, the annihalation of unfair class systems, the complete and total decimating of all unfair things.
Kefka in 2012. You'll be so satisfied, you'll be dancing mad.
With the current American Presidential elections, most people are, of course, focusing primarily on the Democratic ad Repupblican nominations of Obama and Romney. However, most people seem to forget that there are several independent parties on the ticket, and that it is your duty as voters (or, given that a number of you are under 18, interested by-standers) to educate yourself and find the best possible candidate. One that speaks for YOUR needs. One who will REALLY bring change. The leader who will take America's frown and turn it upside down.
Yes, throwing his hat into the Presidential race is none other than Kefka, representing the Cult of Kefka Party. While the Cult of Kefka Party was shamefully not invited to the debates (something about attempting threatening to sacrifice the press box being "morally wrong"), we feel it is important that you know what having Kefka in the White House means for your family.
Kekfa has said since the begining of the race that he will not make a single campaign promise he doesn't intend to keep. Such honesty and upfront politics are surely a boon. For instance, Kefka swears that all people, from all classes and backgrounds, will be treated perfectly equal. There will be no singling out or special treatment, and that the fate of one working class person is the fate of ALL people across the country. With the equality action plan he has written up (refered to as "The Ray of Judgement Stimulation Package), all people will be in the same economic boat within one year.
And let it not be said that Kefka is not concerned for the infrastructure! There will be several new job opportunities available, as he plans to see to the contstruction of many Monuments to Non-Existence, which will take the time and effort of the nation. It's hard work, but Kefka's not one to shirk from duty, and these Monuments will definately give many Americans unemployment problems virtually nihl.
Those in favor of the military certainly have nothing to fear! Kefka has made it clear that he intends to pour tons of gil into all armed forces. And don't worry about all that money going to waste: He then promises to invade every country in the world, making use of those tax dollars. Worried about resurgances in conquered nations? Fear not! Kefka promises to thoroughly crush civilization as we know it, so we don't have to worry about lengthy occupation times. But wait, you say: What happens to all those jobs in the military AFTER ending the world? Kefka promises that every member of the military will always be guaranteed a job working on the Monuments to Non-Existence, and given that he plans to fund a lot of these, there will be no shortage of work. So you see, there will ALWAYS be jobs and security for the armed forces!
Technology and science will not be neglected. Kefka forsees that, if elected, he will have great need for more industrial development and scientific research. In fact, he promises to expand the number of grants to universities willing to partake in the investigation of "Espers." Not only will this stimulate industrial growth, but it pays dividends for the education system!
But don't get the idea that Kefka is all work and no play. He enjoys a good laugh, just like you and me. Nor is he deaf to the pleas of the common man: he gladly enjoys listening to the voices of the millions crying out in unison. He's not afraid to be the clown from time to time, always the life at dance parties. If that doesn't make him accessible and relatable, I don't know what does.
So remember when you go to that ballot box: a vote for Kefka is a vote for the destruction of false promises, the annihalation of unfair class systems, the complete and total decimating of all unfair things.
Kefka in 2012. You'll be so satisfied, you'll be dancing mad.