For reasons I cannot comprehend, some of you do not seem to be very apprehensive of the forthcoming destruction of everything you know and love. This threads purpose is to help ease you into my new, glorious empire.
The Perks:
Being part of my glorious Empire will have its perks, such as...
* A full dental plan! Indeed, under my rule you will have coverage for those pesky cavities and them ding-dang infected gums.
(note: coverage is only good for licensed dentists who are of himilayan descent and are of 100 years of age or older.)
* A pet gerbil for every household! A standard-issue pet gerbil will be given out to all of the homes in our lovely empire! Isn't that amazing?
(a fee of 765$ is required per gerbil. gerbil is non-optional An additional fee of 235$ is required for gerbil delivery.)
* No more cancer! Yes, friends, our Doctors have discovered a revolutionary cure for cancer. What is it you ask? Well its very simple. We take a hypodermic needle, and inject the infected area with 50 cc's of Rattlesnake venom! 100% effectiveness in eliminating your tumors!
(warning: may have a side effect of horrible painful death.)
Yes my friends, all of these perks and more await you!
The Plan will go live sometime in the next 1-5 weeks... look forward to it! More perks will be announced soon!
For reasons I cannot comprehend, some of you do not seem to be very apprehensive of the forthcoming destruction of everything you know and love. This threads purpose is to help ease you into my new, glorious empire.
The Perks:
Being part of my glorious Empire will have its perks, such as...
* A full dental plan! Indeed, under my rule you will have coverage for those pesky cavities and them ding-dang infected gums.
(note: coverage is only good for licensed dentists who are of himilayan descent and are of 100 years of age or older.)
* A pet gerbil for every household! A standard-issue pet gerbil will be given out to all of the homes in our lovely empire! Isn't that amazing?
(a fee of 765$ is required per gerbil. gerbil is non-optional An additional fee of 235$ is required for gerbil delivery.)
* No more cancer! Yes, friends, our Doctors have discovered a revolutionary cure for cancer. What is it you ask? Well its very simple. We take a hypodermic needle, and inject the infected area with 50 cc's of Rattlesnake venom! 100% effectiveness in eliminating your tumors!
(warning: may have a side effect of horrible painful death.)
Yes my friends, all of these perks and more await you!
The Plan will go live sometime in the next 1-5 weeks... look forward to it! More perks will be announced soon!